Home Maid in Singapore!

Gong Xi Fa Cai - Happy New Lunar Year

When thinking of the long 4 day weekend of the Chinese New Year Holiday ahead of us, Pierre and I decided to stay put in Singapore and just relax the two of us; we will take repossession of our house, our sleep and savor our intimacy. We are thrilled at the thought of having the house for just the two of us for a full four days … or so we thought!  We had left one tinny little detail out of our dream equation: Anna will not want to take the time off!!

But it’s Chinese New Year Anna and you have 4 days off, why aren’t you making plans? Why aren’t you out with your friends celebrating and having a good time.  No Mam, I feel lazy and want to stay with you and Pierre, doing not much at home, cooking dinner, etc.  NO! I mean No! Anna, go, please go meet your friends, it is your days off too and we don’t want you to stay around, we want you to go and have fun!!

No Mam, I prefer to stay home with you.

OMG! what happens when your housekeeper don’t want to leave??  Isn’t it our days off too? A time where we can chase one another naked in the house without thinking of getting caught ? Anna may weigh 92 pounds when wet, but she can invade a lot of space in a house. Add her cat Phuket to the equation and we loose another chunk of the apartment.  Pierre and I are often confined to the living room and the bedroom as our space, because Anna and Phuket are in possession of the other 1000 square feet.

Please Anna, why don’t you call the Cheese or the Buffalo or even the Loan Shark friend, I am sure one of them have plans, no??

Anna and her cat

Let me explain: In our world with Anna we need to find ways to understand one another and to follow the soap opera of stories that we hear on a daily basis. Over time, we got very creative and succeeded to identify the people that surrounds her life, and trust me, it can be complicated. First of all, most of them have close enough names get us confused: Liza, Tina, Nina, Pina, etc. and second of all, Anna mixes the “He and She” when she tells a story… and stories she can tell!!  Not only that she tells stories, but she goes to Timbuktu to reach Australia and you end up knowing what bus she took to get there and stories about passengers that got on and off of the bus.  Tales with Anna never end, and she leaves no detail out, not one single element except the point she wants to make, you could go to sleep and wake up an hour later to hear the end of the story, when all you asked was: how is your daughter or your grandson? Sometimes we are afraid to ask a simple question by fear of the length of the answer.

But may I say that her stories are often JUICY! And both Pierre and I have first row tickets to the best gossips of Singapore. Who needs People Magazine when you have Anna working for you!

For about five years now, I keep on telling my friends that I want to write a television series that will be called “Home Maid in Singapore” and the source of my script and scenarios will be Anna and her circle of friends.  With her group of acquaintances alone, I have enough juicy stories for at least seven seasons.

The problem is that Anna likes to talk so much that we get confused on who is who and what the stories are, hence Anna started to give them nicknames that will help us recognize the who’s who of the maids world.  This now explains the Cheese and the Buffalo mentioned earlier.

The Cheese bears this name because she works for a cheese importer of Singapore, the Buffalo inherited her name at Anna’s graduation, because this girl impressed me with her story on how she bought a Buffalo to make a business for her family in hopes that they will stop dilapidating her money.  Anna also has a friend that we call the loan shark and one that we identify as the ‘sell her body’ and those two do not need further explanations on how they got their nicknames or what their sidelines are on Sundays.  There is also the “Kill Dog” who was the girl who killed, or shall I say assassinated her employer’s dog because the furry little thing was getting on her nerves.  We found out few months later that the poor girl had a brain tumor and was hallucinating, paranoiac and had a temper control problem. No kidding!!   She returned to the Philippines and unfortunately died few months later from lack of good treatments and a delayed diagnostic.

In our collection of characters we also have the “lost dog” who lost the two dogs of her employer while they were away in Australia. One of them returned but the other one vanished for good or so the “lost dog” girl says.  There is one that we name the “pregnant” even if she had an abortion 5 months ago.  She was expecting from a Chinese man who was married with children and did not want the trouble in his life nor pay for the abortion.  She went to Malaysia and borrowed money from her employer to do it, otherwise the government of Singapore would have returned her back to Philippines.  There is the “top-up telco card” girl who has a side business of scamming other maids with telephone cards for double the price, and there is the “Mental Breakdown” one that Anna used to refer to as the “Mentality breakdown” until I explained to her the difference.  And the list goes on and on so you can imagine the cast of actors we would need to manage in our TV series.

Home maids in Singapore

Now, to protect the innocents I cannot go into too much details, but just imagine how juicy it becomes when the stories extend to the employers’ life.  These girls work for diplomats, for expatriates or for rich Singaporeans so needless to say that we know things that would  make soap operas such as “The Bolds and the Beautiful” or “As the World Turns” a new shade of pale. Some sleep with their employers (of course without the knowledge of the wife) and know the password of the employer’s email inbox.  A few months back, one of the maids discovered through the email account of her employer that he was having more than one affair, shall I say outside of the house.  What happens when the mistress finds out that her man has a mistress? Well, believe it or not, she sides with the wife and poison her mind!!

When I think of it, I believe there are more bolds than beauties sometimes!

Yes, some of these girls can be a marriage breaker, because for many Filipina or other Asian girls, catching a Westerner is their lifetime goal! For many of them, a Westerner is a trophy and a great ATM machine.  They will tell you how gorgeous you are and how much they love you if it means that you will round-off the monthly budget and be a potential visa of entry to another country.  Be it you are 70 and she is 20 something, if you want to open your ears to it, the ladies will sweet talk you into romance. Even if often it means leaving your wife and kids behind!  I do not know what percentage of marriages end-up failing here, but there are many who get what we call here: the yellow fever! A disease that catches some men and makes them lose their mind!   Don’t worry, Pierre  and I are not in danger

But the known obsession of the Filipina to get an American, Australian or European in their life can make these poor and sometimes naive girls a great target for scammers.  In the past few weeks alone, at least 8 of Anna’s maid friends mentioned in my blog were taken for hundreds, even thousands of dollars by Nigerian groups that go on dating sites and post fake profiles of a handsome Westerner who will fall in love with the filipina girl who he catches and write hot and juicy text messages of love to her.  The girls all fall like flies for the handsome Romeo, so when the unfortunate handsome westerner gets his wallet stolen in Africa while on a business trip and pretends to have no one else to turn to but her for help, the girl sends him money to buy his plane ticket to Singapore to meet with her and live happily ever after.  Of course they are left standing at the arrival gate since the Nigerian men behind the scheme are pure fake! But the money they lose is real and represent months of work for the girls.

There is even one girl in Singapore who actually stole the jewelry and money of her employer (about $60,000′s worth of it) to send to the poor business westerner who needed to buy equipment to complete a big project in Africa.  The girl got caught for stealing the money and is now in jail, but the Nigerian guy who took advantage of her is now hitting on someone else in the world, probably in Singapore.

Thank God Anna trusts us and shares these stories so we can give her advices for not getting caught herself.  Many times we need to even insist for her to believe us and in her disbelief, the other day, I went online and showed her the photos used by the Nigerian scammers and a photo of the real Nigerian man behind the mask .  She was chocked when she recognized the photos of all the beautiful Westerners that are dating her friends online.  She tried to warn her friends but for most of them it was too late, the money was already wired.  One girl was about to leave her job here to go work for a rich handsome European that offered her a highly paid job but needed for her to send money to get the Visa and the related working papers, all fake of course.  Go see the guys at: http://www.romancescam.com/scammers4real.htm and please share the link with your friends because not only Singapore maids get trapped in this scam.

As I am writing this blog we are at the last day of the Lunar Chinese New Year and Anna is still with us, laughing at the thought we wanted her to go out, in vain.  She just surprised us at the pool this afternoon, asking us what we wanted for dinner.  Pierre and I looked at each other and responded: We will go out for dinner Anna since you won’t leave us alone.  She laughed and went back in to call the Buffalo and make plans!

All beautifully dressed-up in a black outfit that made her look as if she is 24, Anna finally left for dinner at 18:00 hrs on the last day of the holiday!  I am sure she will be back by 21h00, the latest!

Cheers Anna and we love you!

Seven is not enough!

When I read the news that they had replaced the Seven Wonders of the world with a new list, like most of you, I was first curious to see what they had selected and eager to check how many of those Wonders I had seen or I should place on my Bucket list – sort as a checklist of things we can notch on our life belt.  As I read through the new list : http://www.new7wonders.com , I started to feel melancholic  at the thought that the first 7 ones were being replaced.  That’s when I started to wonder: Is Seven Enough?

Why do we have the urge to replace and dispose of existing things when we want to add new ones on the list?

When we look at how the world turns in turmoil – or when we look at all the horrors and pains people suffer through in countless parts of the planet- when we look at the hardship of women in Afghanistan – the sex trade of children in Cambodia – the physical abuse that cowards inflict on others – Don’t we need at least a 100 Wonders to make-up for the daily horrors?

How many Wonders do we need to vote on the list in order to appease the dehumanization of a society that let a 2 year old toddler dying on the streets of China? How many Wonders shall we claim in the news to make us forget that a woman and her accomplices in the USA kept mentally ill people in an inhumane basement cell to collect their social disability check (an additional 50 people are missing). In both these cases, I wished for them to die; the poor little girl to be spared from a life of vegetative state and the Philadelphia woman because not only does she deserve to die, but she has lost forever the right to live in any world.

So why keep it at only Seven Wonders when today’s world beats 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year with hardship.  Give us at least one Wonder per day to be marveled about in order to counterbalance the daily bad news.

So allow me to make my first contribution and I challenge you all to add your grain of salt at the end of this post.  So here are my 7 Wonders to add to the new Seven and the old 7 which makes a total of 21. Tomorrow, we will start the day with a new total of 21 wonders to look forward to, the equivalent of three weeks done and 49 other to fill-up.

There are no hierarchic preferences in my list below:

1. True Friendship

Friendship comes in all shapes and forms

What is more wonderful than having true friends for decades and although you don’t see them often, sometimes with gaps of years, you start your encounter as if we had talked yesterday.  I am fortunate to have several of these true friends, including my family, the ones I would never let go of – that are not judgmental – or try to play the guilt trip – or have sentiments of jealousy, envy or worst, opportunistic fake friends.  The true ones are simply pure hearted friends that don’t demand much, but give so much in return.  I believe they would say the same of me.

When I saw my friend Diane in Bali after 6 years,we sat at the restaurant and just lived the moments for 2 days – when I hopped on a plane to Côte d’Azur (from a business trip in Belgium, just in case you wonder) two weeks ago to see my dear friends Richard and Christiane, we again simply started where we had left off 6 years ago and the world seemed magical.  When my longest standing friend of 32 years, Sue, came to Singapore last summer, we were both ’30′ again and simply continued our wonderful journey together as if time had not altered us in any way.  The same goes when seeing or speaking to Nicole, with whom I never want to hang-up on Skype, and often wonder how I survived so long without speaking to her or seeing her.

The amazing thing is that I keep on adding extraordinary people on this list for the past ten years; Marie-Laure, Pauline, Bob, Jennie, Lorainne, Marjorie, Roger, Suzanne, Nikki, Tanya, Daniela and so many others (terrible to have started a list because I would need to continue for too long to list you all and others would get bored, so please don’t feel insulted if I stop here).  To all of my very good friends that I need multiple hands to count them on, including family, to the extraordinary people I am fortunate to have in my life, your love and friendship is my special Wonder!

2. Flying 

Have we taken for granted the magical Wonder of planes simply because they have been part of our daily life for so long?

-I can’t!

To me, planes or should I say flying is an extraordinary Wonder that allows us not only to explore the world, but to open doors of our lives.  What is more magical than to hop-on and hop-off an airbus to go live a moment with dear friends, to conduct business in any parts of the planet,  to relax on an island beach with your loved ones or discover other Wonders that you capture with your camera hoping to never forget the emotion, that special moment!

What can bring more magic than leaving home after work and be able to have dinner in Thailand or Bali in less than two hours, for less than $200 a ticket?  What is more awesome than looking at your passport, flipping through the 48 pages while reading the different stamps? To me, the sound of that ink stamp that a custom officer robotically applies on a page, clicks open a door of memories, of souvenirs.  How cool is the thought that I can hop on a plane and have breakfast in Sydney before going to work! Yes, to me, walking in a plane is opening a door to life and for that reason, it makes the list!

3. The Sea!

We often name land or monuments as Wonders, but what about the sea?  If the Amazon forest has made it to the top of the new 7 Wonders’ list, the sea shall have a well deserved place on my list.  The oceans and the seas are home of some of the most majestic creatures small and big – are the reasons we exist and nurture life.  The sea is a Wonder to look at from a shore – helps us see far and dream while showering us with unimaginable powers and beauties. It is a playground, a source of inspiration and pleasure, both above and under.

Yet it is so powerful and unpredictable that at any given moment it can furiously remind you that you cannot dominate it or master it.  The sea is the essence of life and is one of the rare elements that can proudly say to have it all in one.  For that and more, it makes the list.

4. The Canadian Rocky Mountains

You all know by now that I have travelled the world and hopefully will continue to do so.  I have seen a lot of natural Wonders and still remain in ecstasy before a small flower, but when I think of the ultimate beauty, the one that made me feel the most humble in life, I think of the Canadian Rocky Mountains.  I have been to the Rockies in numerous occasions, and each time I experienced an overwhelming feeling of Grand Beauty and humility at once.  Every time I see the Rocky Mountains I think: There ought to be a God or a superior being to have thought of such Wonder.

The imposing, yet refined and majestic beauty of the Rockies are only matched by its capacity to savagely make you regret you tried to conquer it, to dare it and to ignore the warning signs.  The Canadian Rockies bear enough unexpected marvels and sights to cure any negative thoughts or sorrows in someone’s soul or to make adventurous adrenaline junkies feel content.  Yet, just like the sea, never forget that it can and will whip you into misery if you dare to confront it unaware of its God like powers.  For its extreme and unparalleled beauty and power, the Canadian Rockies have been in my top Wonders of the world for decades and yes, I did go to Queenstown in New-Zealand, had a peak at the Himalayan in Nepal and went a few times in the Alps.

5. Courage

Photo from Geoff Collins email (no source mentioned)

I know that for most of you, the disastereous floods in Thailand are one of the news you glimpse at in the morning or at night, but for my friends and colleagues in Thailand, there is no escape.  Yet, the extraordinary courage and positivism of the Thai people is an amazing Wonder on its own.

-I will use my brain to find ways to survive this, said my friend Ning in Bangkok, this is something I have never used my brain for so it should be interesting and I will learn from it. Another colleague said: The water has invaded the first floor of my house, but we move everything to the second floor so we should be OK.  

Let me stop you for a moment.  The water under which the Thai people have been flooded for over 6 weeks now is the awfully dirty waters of  the Chow Praya river, mixed with the sewage of the city, including all chemicals and garbage that cut loose.  Rats, poisonous snakes, crocodiles and other sort of animals are either climbing for survivals or escaping their surroundings to establish their new water kingdom.  Disease, fungal infections, rotting walls and furniture is facing, with devastation, the Thai people as they will need to live for months in unthinkable conditions while reconstructing their lives.

Yet, their creativity and beautiful smile lifts them up every day to try to conquer the elements – build bridges and sidewalks out of shopping carts – sitting in an internet cafe with water to the waist to communicate with their loved ones – walking out of their house wondering how they will go through the day, but never forgetting to make an offering to Bhudda.  It is only the beginning of their hell, because when the water will retrieve, in a month’s time, the magnitude of the horror will be exposed. I already know that Thai people will all join forces courageously to make life as normal as it can possibly be. They will have lost their cars and most possessions, they will try to fight diseases and outbreaks, they will fight to restore their life and go to work, but will keep their legendary smile.

By now, I will remind you that you already forgot the courageous Japanese people who are currently, after 9 months, still cleaning up the damage of the earthquake and Tsunami in order to perhaps one day find life normal again.  Life is also not back to normal for many in Christchurch. Because we forget so easily how much courage it takes to help others in distress, survive and rebuild our lives after such devastating traumas, I place courage as one of my seven Wonders!

6.  New Zealand

Yes, I did say that the Canadian Rockies beat the mountains of Queenstown, but New-Zealand as a whole is an extraordinary natural Wonder.  New-Zealand is the only place Pierre and I went and said: This is it, let’s buy a house and live here forever!   This country has so much to offer, so much visual beauties and natural untouched resource, the waters are so pure, the sky so blue and the landscape so diverse, that exploring these islands is a heavenly experience.

The only reason why we did not buy a house and moved there is because of my Wonder number 1: Friendship and family!  New Zealand is one of the farthest places to reach from America and is pretty much remote from everything on the planet, so that would mean to cut too many ties, which we are not ready to do.  Yet, it does not mean that it can’t make the list of my personal Seven Wonders.

7. Angkor and the Cambodian people

I do not know of a person who went to Cambodia and  visited Angkor and did not say: It was extraordinary, yet after two days were “templed out”, because there is so much to see!  I have never met someone who spent time in Cambodia and did not feel transformed from it, sort of a spell that invades your soul and stays engraved in your memory. I’ve never met a human who did not get moved by the eyes of the Cambodian children who smile at you with kindness and sadness, often because they already have seen more than they should. I have never talked to travelers who visited Cambodia without them saying that they have to return.  For this great civilization that once existed and for the unearthy kindness of the divested young people of the country, you derserve a place of honour in my list.

I will not say much more about Cambodia, I want you to go and experience it!

Now go ahead, it is your turn, add one or two Wonders to the world at the end of this post. Actually add more than one because today I learned that an egg farm called Sparboe in the USA lost MacDonald as a client due to the undercover report of a group of animal activists. The cruelty that  was inflicted to the chicks for fun and disregard is unspeakable.  Coming from a USA based farm is even more of a shame – they cannot blame lack of education or ignorance or evolution, we can only blame sick human behavior.  They deserve to be shut-down for ever.

Thanking you in advance for adding a Wonder for this one!

For the good news:  My Fuji Xerox Twins Campaign won a Global Pearl Award in New-York on the 7th of November.  You can see the short 3 minute video at:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZ7JN2reAsg  

Cone Island!

On the very first day of July, Pierre and I landed on Cone Island for a two-week vacation. Two intense weeks pre-filled with plans of seeing friends and families, with ambitions of making country-side escapes, while hopping in stores with a long shopping lists of things we wanted to bring back, including: Maple Syrup!

For those of you who think that I misspelled the famous New-York Coney Island in the title of this blog, think again, because I really meant Cone Island in Quebec, Canada. Some of you may also know it as Montreal!

Anywhere our obligations or errands were taking us, anywhere we had to reach a destination in Montreal, the journey was endless. Every single day that we ventured in the city, we had to scratch-off the agenda the things we had NOT accomplished , rather than the ones we had planned to do, simply because of the traffic jams of Montreal.

Stuck in the middle of concrete hell, we often wondered if we would survive the journey. Stuck between grey cement structures with nets installed to catch the falling concrete chunks of debris, we wondered if this would be the day we die. Prisoners of the grey tone of the rotting autoroutes and bridges of Montreal, we wondered how to keep our spirits up. Our lives seemed to be a sad cement-grey, except for the cone colour of the day (every day): bright orange, often covered with white stripes or sometimes white tips, but always with one thing in common: No workers in sight.

Welcome to Cone Island! photo: Time Striping, inc.

Yes, tens of thousands of orange cones have been spread across the city of Montreal and all major routes have been either reduced to one lane, closed, blocked, detoured or ripped open. Most cones are placed to alight the traffic of the Turcotte-Yard Interchange that can no longer handle its own weight, let alone too many cars on it, or to alight the Champlain Bridge that is either splitting, stressing or simply losing parts of its structure, depending on the day. Three times during our holiday, the bridge had to be closed due to its dangerous state. As for the Mercier bridge, if you wish to live a long life, let’s say you should avoid taking it, but if you really must cross this bridge, arm yourself with patience and bring a life preserver, just in case!

Upon our return to Singapore, we had barely touched ground when we learned that a 40-50 meter piece of concrete from the Ville-Marie tunnel (the main tunnel of downtown Montreal) had crumbled on the expressway, luckily avoiding the worst catastrophe: killing people.

I will say it loud and clear, MONTREAL SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF ITS CONDITION AND INFRASTRUCTURE! What used to be a great place to live, has become a third world city and actually the term “third world” is light because at least, developing countries are trying hard to get out of their situation, while Montreal seems to be struck by the “Boiling Frog Syndrome”! When a frog is thrown in hot water, it will jump out to survive, but if you place a frog in cold water and slowly bring the water to boil, the frog will adjust so much to its environment that it will stay in the boiling water until death occurs. I have never done the test myself as I am against animal cruelty, but it is a fact that scientists have tested.

Please spare me the excuses that Montreal’s climate is responsible for the poor conditions of the road and the deterioration of the infrastructure (although it plays a role in making it age a bit faster). The true recipe behind the desolation of Montreal is a combination of negligence with poor quality standards and a zest of political incompetence, all marinated in a pool that smells disguised corruption.

Sorry Montreal, but many other countries have the same weather as you and their roads are not in this condition. Many other cities have the same population and age as you and their infrastructure is not falling on the head of its people. Yes, I admit that there are freak accidents everywhere in the world, but please Mr. PM Charest and Mr. Mayor Tremblay, simply admit that you and your management are a shame to the rest of the world. You and your management are stripping Montreal of its true essence: Its pride! You and your management are making me ashamed of my beloved city.

I use to always say to people wanting to visit Canada that they must go to Montreal if they want to see the best city, but now I stay silent or simply say: Yes, Canada has some beautiful parts and Vancouver is really nice.

Mr. Mayor and Mr. Prime Minister, was it also necessary to attack all roads at once? The Jean Lesage highway – Ville-Marie tunnel – the HW 720 and more and more, and yes of course, all the federal bridges too. Beautiful planning, you should be proud! Don’t your guys call each other or is it that you waited so long to act that it all crumbled at once? You truly deserve a medal of incompetence.

Furthermore, what planet do you live on Mister Politicians, where you have 4 months of summer to repair the infrastructures and you let the unionized road workers take their holiday in July. Truly brilliant! By the way, the two-week vacation period called “the construction holiday” is supposed to be the last two weeks of July, but we were there from the 1^st to the 18 of July and not once, I repeat not once, I saw a worker anywhere in the city. My blood boiled even more when people would excuse the situation by saying: but it is normal, it is July and everyone is taking time off!  OK, here comes the boiling frog syndrome again! Some of you actually find this normal!!!!   When I relay this information to the people I work with or my friends in Asia, they are shocked. They systematically say: But why are they doing this? Why do they allow such things? Can’t they just fix this? Well… I guess not!

Yes, ladies and gentleman, it is almost a non-hidden fact that the Unions, the Organized Crime and the Politicians of Quebec have succeeded to destroy what used to be a great city and a great place to live. Perhaps it takes frogs like us who jumped out of the boiling water a while ago to see the danger and to try to warn the others. I can only tell people that the water is hot and slowly killing them, but I am sometimes afraid that Montrealers have perhaps abandoned the idea of taking a stand and are getting used to the hot waters sinking Cone Island.

My sister jokes that a brother or a cousin of Mayor Tremblay has a cone factory or a cone distribution company. Thank God Quebecers have a good sense of humor. All I can say is that while someone is paralysing an entire city with orange cones, a 2 kilometer -8 lane section of the East Coast Park highway in Singapore was moved over night, without disturbing the traffic. Yes, it is a true story: One morning we woke up and the autoroute had been moved, paved, repainted with white lines and little tree bushes had already been planted. Overnight, an 8-lane highway was moved to a new path, so is it so crazy to think that you can properly fix something in Montreal over a 4 month period?

Meanwhile our good friends Fernand and Louise opened their doors to their little heaven in the Eastern Townships where we could gladly resource ourselves, breathe deep, see clearly before the next round of cones would start. Thank you guys, it was an escape that kept our sanity.

Did you know Mr. Tremblay that Malaysia (supposedly a developing country) has impeccable roads, highways and cute manicured flowers and trees for hundreds, even thousands of kilometers. And you know what, they get a monsoon season every year that washes off a lot of land! I wonder how they do it? Would you like to give them a call? Try texting them instead, you might disturb them.

Riviere du Gouffre, Baie-Saint_paul. Photo: Camping du Gouffre

Exasperated by the city, we decided to escape to Baie Saint-Paul, bringing along beautiful daughter Virginie and her handsome boyfriend David. After hours of driving with cones and blocked lanes, we arrived in this stunning part of Quebec that was holding the promise of washing off all the cone images. After a succulent “terroir” dinner with my friend Diane, who has found a peaceful haven with a view to die for on the hills of Baie St-Paul, the bad memories began to fade away and beauties slowly grew inside our souls.

The morning after we hopped in yellow and sky blue kayaks to embrace the natural curves of the Gouffre River. The luxuriant greens and deserted shores of the river combined with its cool water completed the mission of replacing the images in our mind, while the walls of lushes forests and the singing birds protected us from the noise of the towns and highways.

After 3.5 hours of pure nature, Pierre pointed out something strange that we could not yet make sense of due to the distance. But the closer we got and the more we could recognize this foreign object polluting the right bank of the beach. The four of us looked at each other with horror and screamed: OH NO! …AN ORANGE CONE!!!

I rest my case.

Helene

P.S: Some of you may be offended and think that I am not patriotic, but on the contrary, I love Montreal and it makes me sad to see it crumble. I deeply and strongly believe that being patriotic does not mean that you have to accept mediocrity. Au contraire!

So send emails – tweet – Facebook or write letters to your MP’s, your city councils, the mayor or make noise, you might wake-up someone. My contribution is my blog.

The Five Year Itch!

In a few days will be the time that marks the 4 year milestone of my journey in Asia. When I think back to that day, I close my eyes and try to feel the moment again – the moment when I sat in the Air Canada lounge and a good-looking stranger came to ask me if he could invite me for dinner upon my return of what he thought was a business trip – I smiled and said with the pale shadow of the voice I had left:

If you are able to wait two years, maybe!

Just saying it gave me an adrenaline rush with little twinkle of excitement in my stomach: For a moment my mind was trying to take a peek at an untamed part of my life that I was eager to start.

Another flash back again and I see myself in my one way business class seat looking at the passenger next to me who asked:

-Where are you flying to this morning Miss?

I am going to the other side of the world, in Singapore, to start a new chapter of my life!

When speaking to me I could see he was intrigued and distracted by the large bandage with surgical tape that was showing stains of blood on my neck. After all, only 5 days before I had gone through surgery to remove a tumor of the parathyroids, and since the beast was wrapped around the vocal cord nerve, I had lost my voice. But nothing could stop me from taking that plane, nothing could stop me because I was convinced that this new chapter of my life had already been written for me.

Sipping life five years at a time

Indeed it had been written for me… or should I say by me! For the past 20 years, I do a five-year assessment of the shape my life has taken, and then I set new goals and craft my dreams for the next five. In december 2006, during my 6 day retreat isolated in a spa in Biarritz – France, I have written the life chapter that I am about to wrap-up. Not that it means I am leaving Asia, because I am not, but rather that it is time for me to scratch the surface of my new Five year Itch!

But let’s look back to see if my life has unfolded as written. After breaking the seal of the envelope that had been put to rest for five years, I can safely say that the story was mine: I read this message to myself dated from December 18, 2006: I had decided to have an international career, preferably in Asia and Australia because not only it was an unknown world to me, but it was going to be the ruling world of the future, so I must get to know it. I wanted to understand and live the Asian culture – I had hoped that the man who meets my standards of integrity and values of life would cross my path and I had promised myself to not settle for less – I wished to live in a warm climate, away from the harsh winters of Montreal – I had imagined rebuilding my career and re-establishing my credibility in a world that did not know me, I pictured to be invited to deliver conferences everywhere in Asia, to explore my new passion for writing, perhaps even write a book! In my inspirational letter of 2006, I had listed the countries I would visit, the decor that surrounded me and I pictured myself sitting on a long chair somewhere, on a sunny day, five years later, assessing my plan.

Always add a bit of magic to life

I can say that my life unfolded as planned, almost to the T, and sometimes with magic. Thanks to intense therapy, I got a voice back after 3 months of my arrival (not the same but way good enough) – I am now married to a wonderful man who joined my path after 4 months of my arrival here – I have done countless trips in at least 15 countries and am constantly answering requests for conferences in Asia and sometimes Europe. And today, I am sitting in a long chair next to the beautiful swimming pool of our condominium complex in Singapore and I am writing my story to you, not in a book, but in a blog.

I can also say with certainty that it is because I do this five-year exercise that I knew right away – four and a half years ago – that the job opportunity in Singapore (which came to me out of the blue 3 months after my Biarritz trip) was indeed for me. It was written… not in the sky, but in my plan! Engraved down deep it my subconscious and in my sealed envelope.

the swimming pool at our condo

What I did not know was the impact that my decision would have on other people. For the past 4 years, I received several comments – emails and messages from people who decided to make bold steps in their lives and wished to let me know that their decisions were inspired by me. Some started to write their own story after reading my blog, others took a sabbatical, changed work, opened their horizons to new life opportunities, decided to finally make the trip of their dream. Lately, following the publication of an article in the Athabasca University Magazine about my 5 year story, complete strangers wrote to me telling me that they are touched or inspired – that they now want to do something similar, shaping the recipe of their lives with their own ingredients. I am touched by these comments and I can honestly say that I feel privileged of the trust I am handed.

Mumbai November 2010

So it is now time to complete my new five-year plan, but this time it is different: It is no longer ME but US, so all plans will no longer be of what I want to do with my life, but rather what we would like to accomplish together, what will be our next chapter. This time I have a co-writer!

Pierre and I wondered how we were going to do this exercise this time around as we are two strong career people with different personalities. So we hopped on a plane to Bali to unwind – dive – rest and… write our plans. We first wrote our own unique letter to ourselves and then compared it to see if we had a common path or if we were going to be faced with very opposite directions and have to make major compromises. To our relief, our letters had all the same essential common elements to carve a healthy future with just the right dose of individuality.

Queenstown New Zealand

I know you think that I will share the plan with you, but I will let you itch for a while, since the purpose of my blog is for you to follow the journey.

Cheers!

Helene

Under the Spell of India

You have not heard from me for a while due to my intense traveling and work schedule. Since I last wrote a blog, I must have been to more than 12 countries and probably a couple of times, sometimes up to three times in the same ones. I have so much to tell you when I think of all the wonders I have the privilege to see, I have so much to share with you when I think of all the great encounters I get to experience, but this time around, I will let someone else do it for me: I am lending my space to my sister!

When I first step foot in India (last November) I could not believe this country; a vibrant buzz that challenges all your senses at once and that makes you feel so alive. I knew right there and then that this country would have a place of choice in my blog to talk about what is rightfully promoted as “Incredible India”. But then, my sister Claire and her husband Eddy went on a trip to India few months after me. She wrote to me a couple of emails relating her trip and I was touched by her writing, it truly came from the bottom of her heart and described so well the daily life of these wonderful people. So I decided to lend my seat for a moment to my sister Claire, for her to tell you about this fascinating country that is India and not because I have no time to write, but because she did it very well and deserved the stage.

Amongst many others, here’s the email that she wrote at the end of their journey.

Delhi, February 2011

Here we are in this large, modern and spotless Delhi airport, which only opened 8 months ago. Yet, here we are in the business lounge of this impeccably clean airport looking at some of the filthiest carpets we have ever seen in any lounge anywhere. In a nutshell, this is India, a land of endless contrasts. A fitting end to a fascinating voyage.

Delhi was visually a surprise today. Although it contains almost (short of a couple of million) as many inhabitants as Mumbai, it is not condensed like nor as crazy on the roads as Mumbai. Here in Delhi, the roads are in pretty good condition and the city is quite green with trees everywhere and many parks. The fact that it spreads out on all side offers some relief to the centre of the city where the circulation flows fairly well in a semi-organized fashion. However, the road flowing into and out of Delhi is often the subject of huge traffic jams since there is only one main “highway”. Apparently, Delhi has reduced its pollution by 30% in the last decade by converting a large portion of their vehicles to natural gas, quite an impressive result. We were also told that 60% of the population own their own home. It is, of course, the capital city and every step forward begins here.

However, we have also seen the conditions in which the other 40% live in, some in slums spread out in every directions but for the first time since the beginning of our journey, we have seen total hopelessness, people face down on sidewalks, in parks or anywhere they can find a spot. Homelessness is prevalent here and it does get so cold at night in the winter. To think that one can be so unimaginably impoverished that even living in a slum isn’t an option. There are no words.

Children beat drums and do acrobatic dances on street corners all day long hoping that drivers stopped at a red light will be giving them a few rupees. If they are lucky, they will bring back a little bit of money to their family, but they are unlikely to see the benefit for their efforts when they go back to their parents since many exploit their own children as a course of everyday life. Exploitation of children is everywhere and seems well tolerated. A local guide mentioned the sadness of the red light districts in India where children are traded for sex and treated like animals. I can’t even go there in my mind. Not so long ago, these children were kept in cages until the government told the exploiters that they could no longer do that, but this is where any help to these children stopped. Children are exploited at many different levels in many countries on this planet, but the sheer size of the population and the extreme poverty in India contribute to perpetuating these devastating conditions.

As if it was not enough, Delhi is also particularly dangerous for women. Rape is rampant in the city and we were told that no female should set out after dark, tourist or not. Worst however, is that most rapes are never reported because of the stigma attached to it and the insensitivity toward the victims. The family would disown the injured woman as she would be considered to have shamed the family. Most perpetrators never get caught as police does not take these cases seriously and on a rare occasion, when they do find out who did it, he/they will only receive a slap on the wrist. This is what this capital city lacks the most: respect towards women, children…humanity. Again, quite in contrast with Mumbai where men and women enjoy both a certain safety and equality in everyday life, where even poor families seem happy, protecting and caring for each other. Not that Mumbai is perfect, it is in fact a crazy mess, but its inhabitants seem kinder, gentler than in the capital city.

Delhi is more organized but it does not have the kindness of heart that we have come to know in India. We did learn that the majority of illegal immigrants in India are from Bangladesh and it appears that it is impossible for India to control it as they just blend in with the Indian population without particularities.

At the end of this journey, we can say that we are coming home changed in many ways. Grateful for our lives because, of course, our perspective has been one of travellers peeking into India under the very best conditions at the very best time of year, but our hearts have been filled with the kindness and gentleness of the Hindu people. Yet, as we step away back into our lives, our hearts break for the ones who continue to live day in and day out in incomprehensible conditions and for the hopelessness perpetuated by those who have lost their way. It is not clear, to me at least, that India can become this great nation it aspires to be while leaving behind such a large number of its population. India’s willingness to try to implement change is essential but the challenges are great in the face of some of its long-standing traditions and antiquated beliefs.

The little girl dressed in red

As for us, if we had to make the choice between returning to any of the beautiful countries we have visited in Asia or coming back to India, it would be India in a heartbeat because this beautiful little girl dressed in red in the photo on the left, who has to work most of the day at the market in Udaipur to help her family sell dates, exploded into a beautiful smile and sparkling eyes when I looked into her eyes and gently smiled at her. To my amazement, she extended her hand to me and handed me a date wanting nothing in return.

This is the true essence of India.

Claire

P.S: If you wish to get a glimpse of the 20 years of growth in India, see this CNN youtube video
http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed_edition&videoId=business/2011/04/13/chiou.bric.india.cnn

Thank you sis for this great review of India and I do share the same thoughts on how India has a way of throwing a spell at you and make you want to go back to her no matter what.

For now, I am taking back my seat, ready to write the next blog!
Helene

Who is Darwin?

Allow me to tell you!

If you are in your twenties and have not heard of Darwin, let me tell you that he is the father of the evolution theory. If you don’t know what the theory of evolution is, please Google it as I have a blog to write and certainly don’t want it to be an encyclopedia. If you do not know what Google is…you are an extinct species in the theory of evolution.

Darwin once said about Borneo: “one great wild untidy luxuriant hothouse made by nature for herself.” And I must say that it is an impressive piece of property. As you may have noticed through my posting, Borneo has become a playground to Pierre and I, the place where we got married, the surrounding seas we often dive in, the adventures we love to plan such as our latest one: An educational and photographic safari in the jungle with our great friends Marjorie and Adam, who came to visit from Canada.

Our resort in Borneo at dusk

Borneo is an eyeful of wonders and creatures that only exist or survive in this 730,000 sq. km of dense jungle forest, or what is left of it. A place that plays an important balancing role for the sustainability of life on this real planet. It is the Amazon of Asia and just like the rest of these magic kingdoms, the Island of Borneo is filled with unusual and unique creatures that you will never get to see unless you plan Borneo on your Bucket List. But if you do put it on your visionary board of things to do in life, please hurry because Borneo is cooking at high speed in your kitchen.

The gigantic island of Borneo belongs to Indonesia for the most part while a very small portion of it belongs to a little tinny Sultanate called Brunei, who’s Sultan is known for his extravagances and who has become rich because of the crude oil found in his minuscule kingdom. Then comes Malaysia who owns (since 1963) 27% of the island, a place that mainland Malays call: East Malaysia. Malaysian Borneo is part of the Federation of Malaysia and is, in land size, way bigger than its mother country. The so-called natural resource and main industry of Malaysia is another type of oil: Palm oil, a vegetable cooking oil that is the frying basis for half of the world and that is also partly used for bio fuel, although the latter one is not in full bloom yet in the consumer market.

When you fly over Malaysia, you see as far as your eyes can reach, palm plantations! Natural forests or jungles are confined in small government defined parks or reserves that are not very big in size. It is the nature of things here and a comprehensible evolution as this kind of oil is the driving force and growth of Malaysia.

But now that the mainland has been developed pretty much to its fullest, the logical step was to develop East Malaysia, so just like the Amazon, the jungle of Borneo is burned to give place to large palm plantations and now the small farmers are turning their land in palm plantations as well. It is again very comprehensible since growing corn or bananas would give them about $500 (USA) per month while a palm plantation will generate 5 to 6 times this amount. For these small families it means food on the table and university for their children, so please park your judgement at the door because I do not believe for a second that any of us would act differently placed in the same situation.

Indonesia, who sees his neighbour growing at a fast pace, is joining force to burn forests in Borneo and Sumatra. For the past 10 days, Singapore had a haze of smoke so dense that we could hardly see the city and has reached a level of pollution that was above the permitted 100 PSI, a level considered as dangerous. In Singapore we knew that the day the wind will change direction, the city will come back to its clean and clear air condition, but unfortunately it does not mean that forests will stop burning in Indonesia.

The Gomantong caves are a must see!

While the indonesian part of Borneo is still very wild with over 30 different tribes and cultures (even some real head hunters that are not hunting you to offer a job), the Malaysian side is already very developed and holds half of the 15 million inhabitants of the Island. As well, the Malaysian Northern part is the host of some of the best wonders of Borneo, such as four of the greatest mountains of South East Asia including the famous Mount Kinabalu and also the breath taking Gomantong Caves in Sabah. I heard that the Mulu and Deer Caves of the Gunung Mulu National Park are the biggest in the world, but I must say that their counterpart in Sabah are very impressive as well. At one point there are not much differences between 100 or 125 meters in height and wether we can fit 35 or 40 jumbo jets in it.

Marjorie with her fabulous Tilley hat with Pierre

These caves are between 17 to 40 million years old and just like Mount Kinabalu, they are World Heritage Sites so a big thank you to the Unesco folks here. But as a word of advice, get your pants in your socks while visiting the caves, wear very good closed shoes and make abstraction of all crawling creatures surrounding you… I did it, Marjorie too and so can you, so please don’t let it stop you. Our visit coincided with the yearly harvesting of the Swallows bird nests, a delicacy that Chinese people are willing to pay up to $1000 USA dollars a kilo because it is believed to help keep your youth, soften your skin and of course has some sort of an aphrodisiac effect. To harvest these nests, workers climb up 100 meters in the holes of the cave and without much protection or insurance, they risk their lives to get the precious product. It is in fact the saliva that the Swallow use to glue the nest together that is sought after as it holds the secret magic potion.

One of the many imposing trees of the Borneo jungle (Pierre and Adam)

We are the lucky ones since the proximity of Borneo from Singapore allows us to explore this wonder every time we can. We had done some great trips in mangrove forests using kayaks, dove the beautiful surroundings of Sipadan island, we had been impressed by the giant bats hanging by the hundreds from trees in Tawau, at first thinking that they were giant dark coconuts until you get closer and you realise that Hitchcock died way to soon as he would have certainly made a movie called: The Bats! Yet this time, on our safari trip, we explored the wilder side of Borneo and encountered some magnificent creatures that make you understand, without a doubt, that Darwin was right and that life evolves and adapts to its surrounding with magnificent capabilities.

Orang Utan

In Borneo you can find Orangutans and Proboscis monkeys. In the Indonesian language, Orang means Man or People so when seeing the size and human like shape of these great primates, you quickly understand where they got their names from.

Proboscis Monkey

But it is when we encountered in the wild the Proboscis monkeys, a long nose monkey the size of a man with short fair hair, a big belly and a very bright red reproductive organ that we knew we had seen the best of Borneo’s animal kingdom! This humanly primate only exists and can only survive in the jungle of Borneo and we were lucky enough to see dozens of them, perhaps 30 or 40, hanging in trees at sunset. They sometimes look like trailer trash men who are waiting for their wives to bring them a beer, while doing… nothing. A Tiger Beer please!

The baby Orangutan needed to go!

Yet the pigmy elephants stole the show by coming so close to the river, so close to us that it brought the 10 year old girl in me back to the surface. There were many of them, perhaps a dozen, tearing apart the long grass that will unveil the new green tender growth that they are seeking to feed their large pigmy appetite. Yes they are adorable and did I say it: Right next to us on the Kinabatagan River banks. If you ever do this river safari, take a small boat at around 4:00 PM and stay till the sun sets at 7:00 PM. The animals all come to the river to feed and to drink at that time. If you are very lucky like my friend Tim, you may see a herd of elephants swimming across the river. A few crocodiles may be part of the party too if you look carefully around you. If you have time after, take a night walk in the jungle with a flash light (and a guide) to have a hell of a spooky experience.

pigmy elephants stole the show on the river bank

It is sad to think that all these great creatures and outstanding giant forests are critically endangered to a point that they will no longer exist in the next 20 to 30 years, perhaps before. Our generation participated in the destruction of it all and when I see the growth of Asia, the demand for food, agriculture and palm cooking oil, one can only wonder how much time is left before the complete eradication of these unique biological wonders. Do not get me wrong, Asia has the right to live their growth like the Western world enjoyed theirs and although many people of our generation are trying to make people aware of the devastation that is happening around the world and are trying to preserve what is still intact, we will need to count on the new generation to make it real.

But then I get a reality check when I realise that most young people in the world have never bought a CD, have created a new virtual society on Facebook or QQ.com before knowing what the real human one was, that to them agriculture is a fun game called Farmville and Orangutan should get a waxing or be a stuffed animal. When I see that the last survey done in schools across the USA reveiled that 90% of the Y generation had never heard of Michelangelo before it became a computer virus and thought that Jimmy Carter was an actor while most of them had no idea that internet did not always existed, I cannot stop wondering: Who will care?

When I see two young girls or boys walking together but texting to other people without exchanging a look or a word to one another and when I see the world being lived in pixels instead of in emotions, I keep wondering what will the evolution be from now on.

If I ask the question today: Who is Darwin?

I am afraid that the answer will be:

“Darwin is an open source POSIX-compliant computer operating system released by Apple Inc. in 2000. It is composed of code developed by Apple, as well as code derived from NeXTSTEP, BSD, and other free software projects. (source Wikipedia)”

Perhaps we can make a computer game that is called “Save the Proboscis Monkeys and Orangutans of Borneo” and the winner will get a free download of Darwin!

Cheers!
Helene
http://www.orangutan.or.id/media.php?module=content1&id=5&id_sub=5

The river cruise safari

Proboscis waiting for a Tiger Beer

This is How We Treat Friends in China!

Tourist day at Forbidden City

Over the past three years I have been to China about five times, or so I thought!  But in reality, I had been to Shanghai.  This time my business trip was going to take me to three cities, like a rock tour: Shanghai for two days, Beijing for four days and Guangzhou/Shenzhen for the remaining two days.

My first trip to Shanghai, a few years back, made a great impression on me.  This modern futuristic mega polis and financial center had everything you can imagine and more: fabulous hotels, restaurants, neighbourhoods and amazingly cheap taxis.  But this is not what my imagination had made up of China and I wanted to see the real China, the one that is traditional and architecturally different from what I am used to, so when I had expressed this thought in Shanghai,  my colleagues had taken me to the walled Chinatown area!

-How could China have a Chinatown area? I asked my colleague Sunny.

-Well Helene, Shanghai has developed so quickly and in such a modern way that they had to protect a little area for tourists like you who wish to see what it use to be.  The Pudong area that contains all the highest and most futuristic sky rises of Shanghai was a fishing village sixteen years ago and it is now this ultra sophisticated city of 15 million people.

So I thought I had been to China over the last three years because I had been to Shanghai numerous times… But this time, I went to China!

My first stop was again in Shanghai in the French quarters that still has a flair of Europe with a big touch of Asia.  I stayed at my regular Regal International hotel that has a business floor for women and do, like most five star hotels of Asia, understand what the ultimate service and comfort is, to a level you can only experience here. But the 42 degrees in the shade with a humidex factor that gave the sensation of 50 degrees Celsius was unbearable. The extreme heat made your jewellery burn your skin and made walking an effort that would absolutely need to be rewarded with a beer or some sort of a heavenly experience at the end.

The first day, my friend and colleague Steve Baker rewarded me with the beer and the second day,  an unknown local hair dresser salon surprised me with the latter one: A 30 minute hair wash while lying down on a massage table with a head neck, back and shoulder massage that made me believe that there is a heaven on earth, even in this hell-like temperature and that above all, heaven only cost $40.00 (Sing), massage, wash and blow dry included.

Yet, Saturday morning, it was with great enthusiasm that I left Shanghai to my next destination: Beijing.  There, I would spend the weekend visiting with my great friend Kevin who I worked with for a year in Singapore.  Kevin is the kind of genuinely fine intelligent professional that becomes even more interesting as you get to know him.  I feel privileged that he calls me friend and China should be proud of such a fine citizen.  He has a passion for his country that is contagious and it is not because he has not seen the rest of the world or is oblivious to things China still need to ramp up to, on the contrary.  Kevin is one of the best ambassadors China can have. This time, I would also have the opportunity of meeting his lovely wife Sherrie who has done her university studies in Ottawa and speaks an impeccable English (same goes for Kevin).

Peking Duck in Peking

A tour at the silk factory emptied my wallet

As soon as I landed in Beijing I rushed to the Sofitel to get changed for my first sightseeing of the day: The Forbidden city. The new Sofitel was so spectacular and sophisticated that my jaw dropped, but sorry Sofitel, no time to stare at this young beauty because I have a busy happy afternoon ahead of me.  For the next few hours, I played the real tourist in Beijing, from the temples to the silk factory with a stop for the tea ceremony an a walk at Tiananmen Square. To describe the building on my right, I spontaneously said:

-Oh is this the parliament? Then immediately burst out laughing when I realised what a joke I had accidently made.  The government office was more appropriate and I corrected myself right away with a smile on my face.  I meant:

Tiananmen Square

Is this where the country’s leaders are?

-Yes, this is where the government governs Helene! Said my tour guide.

-Every morning there is a change of guards, you should come back to see it.

-They should change them more often I replied, poor them, it is 38 degrees in the shade today and here they are standing still for hours… in the sun dressed in wool!!!

Guard at 38 degrees

The morning after, Kevin picked me up early to drive to the Great Wall.  It is only 50 km away from Beijing, but it took hours to reach.

Beijing has twenty-four million people and approximately 30% of the population own a car.  No wonder lately they experience major traffic jams of 18 km long!!   The traffic is brutal. But while sitting in Kevin’s beautiful Passat and looking around the impeccable highways, all I could see is cars, cars and a lot of nice cars.  Passat, Audi, Mercedes, Lexus, etc.  I did not see one old car in the thousands of vehicles I got to see in the four days I was in Beijing.  One thing I noticed is that Audi and VW have an outstanding market share here.

For the entire day, blessed by a blue sky and no pollution (very rare in Beijing),  I could not once be fast enough to pay a ticket, a drink or anything.  I was treated like a princess and literally felt like one.  At the end of the day, Sherrie and Kevin crowned my princess day with the best Peking Duck  one could experience in the heart of the city where this famous dish was born.  The day could not have been better and I had reached my second heaven of the week, but even exhausted, Kevin insisted that he has to show me the Bird Nest Stadium created for the Olympics, which becomes one of the most beautiful and intricate piece of architecture at night when the lights enhance its features.   Kevin was right, it was spectacular.  I spared him to drive me back even if he insisted as I knew that his little detour to the Sofitel would have cost him a couple of hours in traffic.

If by now you are still wondering what I thought of the Great Wall after all this: It was really impressive under this crystal clear day and worth seeing for sure.  I was not the only one who had this thought because millions of people had the same idea as us that day!  The wall was carpeted with people as far as the eyes can see.  Yes the Great Wall is impressive and yes it is worth seeing, but in reality, it is the people of China that are the real treasure of the country. It is the people of China that is the real China I was looking for. The kindness, intelligence and passion that inhabits the country.

Great Wall with Great Friend Kevin

On Monday, it was time to go to work and after a great successful day I was again surprised by two of my Chinese colleagues who offered to spend the evening with me and show me Beijing from another angle: The Hutongs!  During my first two days I had seen the city of Beijing as the proper, clean modern city with large avenues and government buildings: Beijing was a typical capital with history and lot’s of people buzzing around.

While in a car or walking around I had seen tall walls that I thought were just that: tall walls or fences hiding an embassy or a school.  Never I had imagined that behind these walls lived another city, the one I was looking for.

A walk in the hutongs of Beijing

Walking into a hutong is like entering another world by simply opening the small red door on the wall. It is like a video game that you are facing several doors not knowing what awaits behind.  On the other side of the door is China, the one I had imagined: Small and narrow streets with local people busy with their lives, an entire community intricately taking care of each other with local restaurants that rapidly create a delicious meal behind a curtain that I would not penetrate by fear of discovering what no one should see if you wish for a magical moment to remain intact.

Some of my colleagues, who today live in high rise modern condos, were raised in the hutongs.  While grabbing one more delicious oyster spiced with aromas of freshness, my colleague became melancholic and spontaneously expressed:

-30 years ago when I was playing with my friends in the streets of the hutongs, we were dreaming of success, of owning a condo like the rich people, of buying a car and to have sanitarians in the house with luxury at our finger tips.  This is what I dreamed and this is what I have today.  But when I look back at my childhood, I would give it all up to go back and live in the hutongs again.  The friendship, the family spirit and community atmosphere is so much better.  In the hutongs even strangers take care of you, of your children with all doors open, it is very safe and the world is a better place.  In my condo I don’t know my neighbours and quite frankly they don’t want to know me either.  We live alone with our little family and take the car once a week to visit the parents, we plan to walk 15 minutes to the park to have our children play on Saturday and Sunday.  In the hutongs, life was so much better.

-But would you be willing to go back to basic, get the community toilet with all the neighbours, etc. (my sanitary standards rose above the emotions here)

-True Helene, I might find it hard but today we can renovate the houses and make them up to new standards, he replied.

-Great! Problem solved; sell your condo and buy a house in the hutongs! I enthusiastically replied.

-I cannot afford it Helene, the real-estate in Beijing has gone up so much and many people want to go back to the hutongs so today it would cost millions to buy a house here.

-Wait a minute, are you telling me that all of these great people walking simply on the street or riding their bicycles and living with the strict minimum are all millionaires?

-Yes, if they sell it, yes!

-My problem solver mind continued its thought process with me saying: Great! Sell your condo for 500K, get a mortgage for the rest and buy one.

-They burst out laughing and began to tell me that it is not in their culture to take mortgages. Chinese people pay cash!

Kevin had told me this and the guys confirmed it: In China people save money and pay everything cash.  Their cars, their houses and everything else.

-If you think about it Helene, people may live a simpler life, but the reality is that many Chinese are way more richer than the standard Westerners.  We don’t have debts and we save money. Lot’s of money.

I realised that most of my colleagues, younger than me, who earn probably half of what I make, have more money than their counterpart in the western world.  Think for a moment and remove your mortgage, car debts and credit card payments and then see how much you have left before your next preconceived thought about China invades your mind.

Yes China still has parts that are extremely poor and underdeveloped, and yes they are aware that they need stronger individualistic thinking, but my trip also made me realise that China is as diversified in languages, cultures and standard of living as Europe is.  If you would slice China in several countries like Europe, you would have many countries of 40 to 100 million people with some countries being very rich with a strong economy and astonishing growth and some countries struggling with their development.  China is many countries in one and many of them are debt free!  How is that compare to what is going on in Europe these days.

After nine days of having people carrying my laptop, opening doors for me, paying for every move I make,  reserving the best in class restaurants for me to experience extraordinary culinary discoveries, after nine days of having a window to the Chinese culture thanks to my colleagues and friends who speak impeccable English and translated everything to make my life comfortable, after all this time getting to know these amazing people I felt hopeless on how I will find ways to thank them.

I went back home and sent a gift to my friend Kevin as a small token of appreciation and he sent me the following email:

-Helene, thank you so much for your gift but you should not have done this. It is unnecessary.  We are not colleagues in business, we are friends and this is how we treat friends in China! It is our culture.

Cheers,

Kevin!

Well, Kevin, I thought I was debt free, but I have one now when I think of how much I owe to the great people I met and spent time with in China.  Special thanks to Edmund too. This blog is for you guys!

Cheers,

Helene

A walk in the Emperors Thumbs Park

An artisan at the silk factory of Beijing

The Bird Nest

The Great Wall has been carpeted... with people

Beyond the Great Wall

Lunch time at Forbidden City

Have You Taken Your Lunch?

From $2.50 to $100, you can have your lunch in Singapore

Each country has its own particularity that makes it unique, that makes it different from its neighbour, and every year each of them is trying very hard to attract tourists from all over the world with a slogan or a major advertising campaign. The “I love NY” charmed everyone and was copied by many, the Sunshine State slogan on the license plates of Florida makes us want to migrate for the winter and bite a fresh orange during the cold months.  What about the famous “Je me Souviens” in Quebec that most of you are too young to know what we should be remembering, but still make people ask the question over and over:  What are we supposed to remember??

Singapore is no different in that sense and currently there is an open public debate on the web because Singapore is about to spend millions of Sing dollars for an ad campaign promoting the new slogan: “Your Singapore!”.  Some argue that it is good because each of us has a unique way of seeing and appreciate the beauties of Singapore, yet Singaporeans often raise the patriotic argument that Singapore belongs to them and is not for sale to foreigners as if they were afraid that an ad campaign telling people that Singapore is Yours, will make them give their country to strangers. Regardless of whether the arguments are valid or not, I sincerely think that they are completely missing the point.  What is really unique to Singapore is its way to greet people of all age or ethnic with the cutest question: Have you taken your lunch?

This is most often what Singaporeans will say when you meet them: Hello Helene, have you taken your lunch? And the answer is: Yes!

Saying “Have you taken your lunch?” is exactly like you saying “Hi! How are you?” and you would answer: Fine!

You do not want to hear: Oh! I am not doing good, I had an argument with my 10-year-old this morning, bla blabla bla! YOU WANT TO HEAR: FINE AND YOU?

Nowhere I have traveled to in my life have I been greeted with such an adorable question: Have you taken your lunch?

So here it is to the Tourism Board of Singapore: You are missing the boat and you should make a campaign that promotes the fact that here, you will never go hungry! Singaporeans will not let you! Your slogan should be: Let’s do lunch… in Singapore!

This unique greeting message is asked regardless of who you encounter; you get into a taxi and the chauffeur will look at you and pop the question: Hello Miss, have you taken your lunch? If you go to a corporation for a meeting the receptionist will first ask the lunch question and then (in case someone would have forgotten), the secretary of the President you are about to meet will ask the same question again.  Your answer:  Yes I have, thank you and You?

-Yes I did, thank you!

Isn’t that the most adorable ice breaker you’ve ever heard? Think of every situation you encounter during the day where you say “Hi, How are You?” and now replace it with the Singapore’s unique greeting of “Have you taken your lunch?” Only then you will get the picture.

You can stay reassured that Singaporeans will not skip lunch

But Singaporeans really mean it and food is the most important topic on everyone’s watery mouth.  The newest restaurant (a new amazing one opens daily) or the secret place where one can eat the best Ba-kut-Teh* in town or the best dim sum. What about the best brunch of Singapore? ask 10 people and they each will forward a suggestion. My friend Karen even says that while we are eating in Singapore, we talk about what else we could have been eating and how good it must taste. If you spend a week without someone trying to promote the infamous Durian fruit and challenge you to try it even though the smell is repulsive, you are not in Singapore. Of course, every time they will mention where to buy it or where to get Durian ice cream, Durian cake or Durian tea… name it, they know where to buy it! They even have the Esplanade theatre structure that is an inspiration of the Durian fruit. No wonder two of the top fifty restaurants of the world are located here in Singapore.

Yet, this is the fruit that is forbidden in any public places or transport system due to its overwhelming smell

If you offer a free lunch at your event you will likely have a lineup of people (and trust me, Singaporeans can afford their lunch).  If your ego was boosted because your conference had 200 people, remove the free food and you will see your ego-balloon burst! Poof! Next time 10 to 15 people will more likely be your score.  Food is a priority, yet many and I insist on MANY Singaporeans do not know how to cook.  They go out for lunch and dinner.  Food is everywhere, delicious and for all budgets:  Outstanding duck and rice in a Hawker Centre: $2.50 or a great italian meal at OTTO: $$$$$ Ouch!

So where does this expression come from? Why are Singaporeans so eager to ask you if you had your lunch that it became the national greeting phrase?  I asked the question around to realize that most likely it comes from their grand-parents or ancestors who suffered greatly during famines in China.  When you would meet someone, you would ensure that they have eaten because it was the most precious thing you could offer for survival.  Chinese are not beggars in nature, they would never ask someone to give them food for nothing in exchange so one had to enquire in order to ensure their neighbour does not go hungry. You would never see Chinese people eating alone either or order individual portions. Sharing food is in their DNA and I hope they never lose this beautiful trait of character.  Today Singaporeans ask the question without the weight of the real meaning behind their greeting message, it is in the culture to ask if you had your lunch and as mentioned above, it has the same tone as when you ask the traditional and international “How are You?” At least, “have you taken your lunch” narrows it down to one topic instead of a wide range of answers that one could get from the question: How are you?

But believe me they often really mean it.  The other day, Annabelle (our house keeper) was late to go to school and missed her bus.  In panic of being late she hailed a cab knowing it would cost her the only $15 she had brought with her, but she was determined not to be late and hopped in the cab. During the ride she made a phone call to a schoolmate and let her know that she would be short of money and that she could not accept her offer of sharing her table at lunch time.  The cab driver overheard the conversation and when she reached her destination, the cab driver said:

I cannot charge you miss because I cannot bear the thought that you will have to skip lunch, it is too important!

Annabelle who has been in Singapore for 20 years, did not think it was a very unique gesture even though she was very appreciative and thanked the uncle (this is how we call taxi drivers in Singapore) many times before rushing into the school.

I hope this was food for thoughts for all of you!

Let’s do lunch when you come and visit Singapore.

Helene

*Ba-Kut-Teh is a traditional Chinese Hokkien soup popularly served in Malaysia, Singapore, China, Taiwan and Indonesia

This is what a Durian looks like. It is very big so never stand under the tree, it could kill you!

This is what a Bak-kut-teh is and it is quite good!

Social life “Al Fresco”

We had big plans this weekend, just like we have every weekend we spend in Singapore. We planned a roller blade ride on the 25 km long path in the East Coast Park along the beach, rent a Catamaran and get a nice ride with the hope of not falling in the dirty water and if time permits, perhaps also get ready for next week’s 40 km bicycle ride on the streets and highways of Singapore, an event in which we enrolled.  Yes we had big ambitious plans and that is after saying NO to a couple of other activities we were proposed.

But as I am writing this blog, it is Sunday morning and we are both sitting relaxed, Pierre reading a book and me writing to you. We both are  avoiding to provoke one another with a question such as: Should we get ready to start our activity plans? The cause of our deflating balloon: Our Social life in Singapore!

On Thursday we were at the opening of a the movie “Up in the Air” with George Clooney, Friday at Nicky’s place (our good friend from New-Zealand) for a BBQ by the pool, Saturday night (last night) we had 16 people over at our place for a night “Al Fresco” on our patio with more food and fun that we could handle.  Now we are getting ready for tonight’s social engagement: Dinner at Jim and Val’s place with our trekker friends from Nepal.

Beautiful Singapore at night

The expression “Al Fresco” used by Singaporeans to define eating out on a patio simply makes me smile as it is always a hot 32 degrees celcius, while reaching 19-20 degrees low in the freezing air conditioned restaurants! Nevertheless, social activities in Singapore fill your agenda to the brim. Every week we say yes to an average of 3 invites and say “sorry we can’t” to the same amount and perhaps more. Do you want to come with us to the Wine Dinner Tuesday? How about brunch at the Fullerton on Sunday? Do you wish to come to a pic-nic at the Botanical Garden with us? Let’s do a walk in the Mangrove forest! A cocktail at the Embassy or a night out on a boat, a patio, at someone’s home, etc…You can never feel alone when you are an expatriate in Singapore!

Don’t get me wrong, we are not complaining at all because every opportunity we have to have a great time with our French, American,Indian, Australian, New-Zealander, British, Malay, Armenian or Singaporean Chinese friends, we are tortured when we have to say no. We never run out of rich conversations with them, amazing culinary experiences or delectable wine tasting. They are also a great set of friends that we can count on and that would do anything to help us if we needed anything.  We know they feel the same towards us.  The sad part is living with the thought that they or we could be transferred, change country or move on to a new challenge elsewhere in the world.  That is part of the reality when you are an expatriate.  Although you know they will stay your friends for the rest of your life, we will not be able to see them as often. Perhaps even never again.

It is the case of our friend Ian who is returning to his home country at the end of March.  Ian is the master photographer who is behind a lot of our wedding pictures. We saw him twice in the last two days and only brushed the subject of his departure superficially because we know that it is useless to get into it.  He is leaving for good reasons (nothing to do with Singapore) and probably for good.  What could discussing his departure bring to the table? Nothing! Life is taking him to a new journey and perhaps this also means that within the year Nicky would move too.  We will see him a couple of times during the year when he visits, each time briefly, happy to see him but having to say goodbye again; a goodbye that is a constant reminder that it is too bad that we did not have time to spend more fun moments with him, that we did not go a second time to Bintan Island for a weekend of pleasant conversations with Nicky while watching Pierre and Ian trying to master Kite Surfing, or even just a simple night out somewhere in the heart of Singapore.  This constant “va et viens” of great people that you can only freeze for a moment in time is the harsh reality of expatriates. This is perhaps why you do need to have a good social life, because you never know if your great set of friends might need to be constantly renewed, while hanging on to the ones that will now become global ones.

So perhaps I could give a new meaning to Al Fresco nights. To me it now means that you get a cold chill in your spine even at 32 degrees when you learn that someone you really like is no longer going to be cheering on the patio with you at your next social event.

Cheers my friends!

Helene

Clouds of Rock in Nepal

On the plane back from Nepal, I was holding on to the thought of seeing the photos that I had just finished downloading on the laptop and my heart was pounding just at the thought of reviewing the result of these four days of photography.  But it is deception that was sitting in my computer; sadly the photos failed to capture the essence of Kathmandu …the photos were silent!

It is too often the photos I did not take, the ones that I could not take because I was in a moving car or felt too intrusive to have the courage to click that are the most amazing ones.

I wanted so much to capture the old man carrying this large weight on his head, the young children playing in a small pile of garbage while laughing and the sound and smell of the burning garbage on the streets of the Thamel area.  I so wanted to capture the vibrant atmosphere of the streets of Kathmandu, including the thick air of dust and the multitude of scents, but it is simply impossible.  I guess that just like the people of Kathmandu, my camera was wearing a face mask to filter the pollution.

Then you have the photos that you are forbidden to take.  One of them was the unique opportunity of seeing the Goddess Kumari; this young 4 year old girl that is selected like the Dalai Lama using a long set of criteria and of course, a bit of astrology.  We had the privilege, thanks to the owner of Everest Express, to get a viewing with the Goddess Kumari.  She usually comes out of her monastery once or twice a year to bless the people of Nepal and to bless the leader in place. Such a privilege was priceless so our cameras were ready, caps off and on standby. The security arrived in the courtyard where we were standing in wait of the appearance of this living Goddess, the only one in the world, and at this moment we heard the loud voices saying: NO CAMERA, IT IS FORBIDDEN TO TAKE PHOTOS OF THE GODDESS. The little girl appeared without smiling, with her perfect face full of make-up and no one able to capture the moment.  It is now in my memory for ever; her eyes on mine with both a deep sentiment of curiosity. This moment is now only pictured in my mind but I can look at it as often as I want. At puberty, this Goddess will become mortal again and will go down to the streets of Nepal to live what is said to be “a normal human life”.

So unless you experience it for yourself, nothing can render the “scent” of Nepal (as my friend Tim would express instead of using “smell”).  The noise of the hundreds of cars, motorcycles and tuk tuk, the sound of everybody talking their way through life, negotiating their rice or begging their possible, but little, hope of getting something…anything.  As my husband Pierre would say; Kathmandu’s beat is a fluid chaos where the devoted are poor and the middle class is hard to see through the dust surrounding their daily lives.  A constant dance of cars, humans, dogs and motorcycles who have learned to ignore one another.

When you have a small window of opportunity, you cross the street to avoid a pile of garbage or a beggar who has been following you for the last 20 minutes.  When you have a small window of opportunity you try to look up at the sky to search for what seems to be clouds, clouds that when you focus for a moment suddenly transform themselves in the most majestic and beautiful rock mountains of the world: the Himalayans.

Don’t read me wrong, I enjoyed every second of our three days in Kathmandu, but on Saturday, when the group of trekkers composed of our husbands and other friends of Cass left for their long 14 day journey, my friend Val and I hopped in a jeep and went straight for Nagarkot.

Nagarkot is the highest view point near Kathmandu.  At 2000 metres, it stands right in the middle of all the famous and massive mountains that you heard about in your life: Everest, Annapurna and others.

After few hours of trekking in the breathtaking rice paddy terraces, our guide brought us to our ultimate destination: the Fort resort, a hotel located right on top of the mountain and overlooking the Himalayans.  A pure feast for the eyes!  Beauty and silence was at the rendezvous.

Our first question to the front desk was:

-“Wow! What a fabulous place, do you have a spa here?”

-No Mam, sorry, we started to build one but we had to stop because of the bad politic.

What the nice man wanted to express in his broken Nepalese english, is that they had planned to open a spa but the revolution of Nepal in 2006 and the 3 years of disturbance that followed, killed tourism.  This year was the first time they started to see tourists reappear.  The Nepalese are hungry for tourists and are trying so hard to leave you with a good impression in hopes that we will tell others to come and explore the beauties the country has to offer.

So what should I tell you about Nepal?

Buddha was born in Nepal, a kingdom for the past 250 years which recently  (in 2006) became the youngest republic of the world. This land of dust, rice and poverty is blessed with some of the most grandiose beauties… starting with its courageous inhabitants. What I want to tell you is that you should go to Nepal to see these majestic mountains higher than everything else on earth which makes them look like clouds of rock suspended in the sky.

Namaste!

Can we afford a car in Singapore?

Used Toyota Corolla Altis 2006 $39,000 !!!

There are 28,000 + taxis in Singapore on an island smaller than Montreal and a population of 4.5 million.  Think about it for a second…There are 10,000 + yellow cabs in New-York City (Manhattan) for a population of 11 million!

The subway system in Singapore is simply fantastic, easy and breezy, while the overall public transportation works like a Swiss clock.  By the way, did you know that all buses of Singapore have televisions to entertain the passengers and the looped program shows sketches from the Just For Laughs Festival of Montreal!!!  Yes, when you get caught in a candid camera sketch in Montreal, we see you in Singapore on our way to work.  HOW COOL IS THAT!

Singaporeans also rave about the Cirque du Soleil show that they saw last, but this is no surprise as they are popular on a global scale.

The buses of Singapore are big double deckers with advertising on it.  Since Singapore has no billboards (except for 5 strategic spots on the island) the buses are the moving advertising giants.  At any street corner you are bound to see an ALDO bus or a La Senza Girl showing her best side.  Yes, the home grown Quebec, Canadian brands are becoming very global and are making it big in Asia (I know, I know, La Senza has been purchased by Victoria’s secret and is now American but it is still a home grown brand).

There is also a bakery that claims to have the closest imitation of the Montreal bagel and our corner store sells the Montreal Spices to make your steaks perfect.  Make sure you look on both sides when you cross the streets of Singapore, because you may be hit by a crazy delivery boy on a motorcycle from Canadian Pizza.

What does all this have to do with owning a car? Not much, except for the part on the taxi and public transportation efficiency, the rest is just fun facts.

The thing is, for the last two years we resisted owning a car in Singapore.  if you ever come here, you will notice the large number of Mercedes, Ferraris, Lamborghinis, BMW’s, Porsches, Bentleys and all other luxurious brands you know.  You will judge the wealth by your standards and your price references and form an opinion.  Well… Let me set the record straight.  In Singapore cars are outrageously expensive: A BMW 320 is in the range of $175,000, a Porsche close to $600,000 and a high end Ferrari sells for $1.2 million!  And the price of the car is not the end of it; you have the road taxes that are according to the size of your engine.  Yes, in Singapore, size does matter!

The road tax for a Ferrari is $5000 a year and the speed limit, controlled by photo radar across the city-country, is between 70Km-90Km.  Lots of status on the street, but not lots of worn tires; hence when you come to Singapore and you see the thousands of Ferraris, Lamborginis, Porshes and other luxurious brands, store your opinions and pull out your wealth calculator.

Then I got a call from my sister Claire who casually told me that her husband was looking at perhaps selling his Aston Martin in Montreal for around $150K ($115 cdn).

I thought it was a real bargain, but no thank you Claire, it is an expensive car for the 2 weeks we would be in Canada (I knew she was joking).

By the way Claire, do you know how much you would get for the Aston in Singapore (if it was a right driver seat)?

No Helene, how much? Well, according to the second hand web site I am looking at, around $700,000!

So now you understand why for 2 years we took taxis, and taxis and taxis.  The problem with taxis is that it forbids any spontaneous decisions. You decide on something and often cannot change your mind along the way and when you have no cars, you cannot get up and go for a ride in Malaysia to get away from the island fever. The problem with taxis is that you feel often like you are a tourist and you don’t belong.  This is of course to our Canadian standards and way of living.  The reality is that I have a car since I am 16 years old and never was a day without it.  To me it represents freedom of movements, it is my little space where I can put the music I choose and sing to it if I want and it means that I could leave my rollerblades or camera in the trunk (remember we live in safe Singapore) and decide where and when we will go do something fun and improvised. We can also change our mind along the way, no problem!

Still the decision of leaving the taxi world to own a car was very hard to make because the scheme of owning a car in Singapore is so complicated when you are a foreigner who was not born and raised to understand this pricing and total cost of ownership structure.  You feel intimidated by the amount of information you need to learn depending on the year of the car and the licence fee/buy back price included in your car.  It changes according to the year of the car, the cylinder size, the model and a ton of other info.   It was created by the ministry of transportation to limit the number of cars on the road.  A car in Singapore has a right to licence of 10 years and must be scrapped after (resold to Malaysia, or other Asia countries, by a reseller structure or special permits only).  The right to license is set by an auction because each year the price will change depending on the offer and demand. It can be $3000 some years and reach $50,000 to $75000 other years; and this weight is included in the total price of a car. How much are parking spaces? How much is the road tax? What is the total cost of ownership in Singapore; this is very intimidating for foreigners, while Singaporeans seem to master this scheme by heart.

Then came an opportunity!  A couple leaving for few months in New-York who wanted to rent their car for the 2 month period!

The first few days that we sat in the driver’s seat, we were hooked again: Freedom of movement and instant fun decisions were back in our lives and yes, after only few hours of getting back the feeling of car ownership, we had taken the decision: We are buying our own.

But as mentioned above, the load of information we need to know to buy a car in Singapore is impressive and intimidating. Pierre spent a good week discovering information and searching for the perfect car.

At first you look for the type of cars you enjoyed in your own country: I missed my Volvo and Pierre the Beemer. After few days of research we knew that this life style was way above our concept of spending money.  A BMW is, second hand-3 to 5 years old, no less than $150-250,000 depending on the series!! I could not stop thinking of Eddy and Claire who were about to sell their almost new Aston Martin for the same price in Montreal!  Opportunities are considered opportunities only if you are at the right place.  Let’s not forget in the prices mentioned, that the yearly road tax in Singapore varies according to the power of your car.  A luxury powerful car can easily be between $3,000 to $4,000 a year alone and the insurance premium; A FORTUNE!

So we settled for a Toyota Corolla Altis 2006, which cost us the bargain price of $39,000.  It runs very well while bringing us from point A to point B at 70-80K an hour; the same speed and time as all the Lamborghinis, Mercedes and Ferraris that surrounds us on the highway.  All you need to complete the purchase is a cash card for electronic debit, a system that is used for paying Pay Tolls, fines or any parking in the city.  With a cash card, that you recharge every couple of weeks, any gates and doors open miraculously without any interventions from your part.  Why is this system not found everywhere else in the world? Sorry, cannot help you on this one, I just know that it is an amazing system.

My friend Pauline is back in Singapore after a couple of months of vacation in Montreal and of course, the first thing we talked about was our cars.

-So Pauline, you too bought a car?

-Yes, yes Helene,  Patrick and I bought a Honda Civic?

-New?

-Are you crazy, we could not afford a new one, so we bought a 3 year old car for $55,000!

The car salesmen wanted to sell us a Porsche for $500,000 but we told him we would think about it.  He said that we should buy it now because it was a deal!!!

Wow! I never thought I would feel lucky to have found a Toyota or Honda in Singapore while considering an Aston Martin in Canada DIRT CHEAP!

At the same time my other phone rang; it was my sister Claire

-       Bonjour Helene,

-       Hey sis, how are you?

-       Well, I am afraid I have bad news, the Aston Martin is gone

-       Well Claire it was a little dream in our heart but not a reality. So, you sold it?

-       No, it was stolen by a guy who was test driving it with the intention of buying it… or so he said.

-       Oh my God, wasn’t Eddy on board with him?

-       …Yes but after the road test they both got out of the car to clinch the deal but the guy asked Eddy to give him a few more explanations so he sat back in the car as Eddy was standing next to him with the door open and the guy just took off like in the movies!

-       OH MY GOD!

-       The police said that at least 4 luxury cars were stolen at the exact same location this summer the same way (same MO) and approximately 60 around Montreal by what seem to be an organized network!

-       You guys must be devastated!

-       We are a bit shocked since we were not even convinced that we wanted to sell it anymore.  The police say they are usually rapidly shipped to the middle east.

-Hmmm!  Perhaps it will transit in the port of Singapore!!! I could just use our little cash card to go get it! In Singapore I could leave it out with doors unlock and no one would dare touch it.

Ring…. Ring…

Allo!

Helene, its Claire speaking

Hello sis, what is new?

They found the Aston Martin and it is now getting a pampering check-up at Decarie Motors.

What do you mean by “they found the Aston”

Well Imagine!… that a police officer was doing some training on containers with the RCMP at the port and saw the Aston sitting pretty in one of the containers waiting to be shipped overseas!!

WOW! What a story !  So the Aston Martin WAS at the port…just the WRONG port! I fantasized that it would be in SINGAPORE!  I guess I will never be in the same city as this Aston.

Ciao sis and have a great ride!

P.S.  ANYONE INTERESTED IN this DIRT CHEAP  impeccable ASTON MARTIN? …no thieves please!  :)))

Hélène Blanchette

blancellen@yahoo.com

This is shown as an example of the pricing in Singapore and is not the photo or the exact model of Eddy’s car. Eddy has a Vantage

Aston Martin DB9 photo gallery 10 photos available Background Info Vehicle type Sports Built in United Kingdom Release year 2004 Facelifts done - New Car Dealer Details Authorised Dealer Aston Martin Lagonda (S.E.A) View all Aston Martin cars View the Aston Martin pricelist Hotline 68625868 Booked a new car? Get a better trade-in price here! Submodel Price Instalment  Engine cap Detailed info Coupe 6.0 (A) $706,000 (w/o COE) $6,778 /mth 5935cc Specs Features Volante 6.0 (A) $750,000 (w/o COE) $7,200 /mth 5935cc Specs Features

Here is Eddy’s car

The Girls of Asia

I have been wanting to write this blog for the last year and decided often to postpone it simply because I wanted to ensure that my thoughts and impressions would stick and not change.  After 2 years in Singapore I can say that my thoughts did not really change, but instead, it is the girls of Singapore and the girls of Asia that got the best of me.  Shall I say transformed me.  

For those of you who knew me well, you will be surprised to hear that my closet is now full of dresses, skirts and cute feminine tops, that high heels and shoes have made my closet too small as if they follow me from stores and pile up on their own at the bottom of my wardrobe.  Yes, not so long ago, I was dressed for the business part or dressed for the weather as long as it was stylish and comfortable.  Of course, even dressed for the part, style was a must. All I know is although I was a true defined woman, I had only one or two black dresses in my wardrobe and the rest were business clothes, jeans and t-shirts.

In Singapore and Asia, in general, the daily scenery is filled with beautiful legs, high heels, soft olive skin tones and cute dresses completed by impeccably manicured hands and nails, often showing designs that would make Picasso blush.  Blue, fluo pink , orange or dark cherry, you can have a manicure on every street corner with 3 to 4 girls from mainland China at your hands and feet, smiling and giggling while doing their master pieces .  The total cost: $45 Sing dollars.  Most girls in Asia would not dare to be caught without a dressed toe or thumb!  

-What do you like the most about the girls in Asia Tim and Paul (two of my single colleagues who live in Singapore)?  

-They are feminine Helene, so feminine that they make us feel like real men! Did you see their legs, toes and dresses? They come to work as if they are going to a wedding or ready for a Saturday night date.  Tim emphasized his statement by saying: They are not afraid to be women and I love that about them!

Indeed, they are very feminine and I will never forget the day I went to my first basketball game in Singapore with some office colleagues, and here comes along my friend Grace from Shanghai dressed in a white lace dress with a matching small satin purse and high heels.  The same scenery again last month when Pierre and I went to a ‘Shakespeare in the park’ play dressed in shorts and casual clothing while the Singaporean girls showed up in their latest summer dresses, jacked on high heels without a hair sticking out.

I got my first reality check about a month after arriving in Singapore. A taxi driver, the ones who always tell the crual truth to you, said to me:

-Why are you dressed in pants Mam? You should not lah, it is not feminine and men don’t like it lah! Why you need to dress like man (referring to me wearing pants and not that I literally dress to avoid my feminity)? Do not forget the beauty of a woman Mam. You can have a career without losing the feminine charm.  You should not have to give up your woman charming role for the sake of having a career.   

Of course the constant  32 degree Celcius of Singapore helps to get undressed and the less clothing you wear, the better you feel. Every time  we are about to leave the house to do an activity, I ask Pierre what he wished to see me wear? 99.9% of the time Pierre will point out one of my dresses, even if it is a day of walking in the city, a shopping day or a zoo day, it is a dress day.  If you wear a dress in Singapore, you are always dressed for the part, regardless what the part is.  

The old expression “you can’t judge a book by its cover” does not really apply because in fact, the cover transforms parts of you.  Since I dress very feminine, I feel even more like a woman, it brings more softness to my personality and it makes men more attentive to me.  They want to open doors, pick-up things on the floor when you drop them, compliment you, look at you and treat you with galantry. I like the role play that a man acts manly and a woman is feminine and no it does not mean that I am dominated, fragile or second best, it does not imply that I am not a strong head at the office and it certainly does not mean that I lost anything. On the contrary I gained a lot!

The women of Asia will probably succeed in proving that you can become the head of corporations, the entrepreneur of the year and the mother of the year signing contracts and picking up awards wearing high heels, cute designer sexy dresses and impeccable nails, while slightly bowing with a look of shyness in her attitude. Yet when they will open their mouth at the microphone, it is a powerful woman who will, without a glitch, express her gratitude. They will have told the world that womanly does not mean weak.  They are smart and yes soooo feminine.  

But of course there are many of them that are still the types who are looking for the 5 Cs: Car – Condominium – Cash – Credit Card and Club membership to select their men and love often is not the first criteria of selection.  But as they are evolving, they will all afford it on their own and will be more choosy.  In Singapore alone, there are 23,000 single women that are multi-millionaires carrying an average wealth of $4 million each.  It has yet to be seen how men will feel when women continue to gain this independance. Hopefully the beautiful role play will not be lost when they are out dining and argue on who will be paying the bill?

Until then, I have to go clean my closet to fit my new bright yellow shoes!

What are you doing in your closet Helene.. Are you ready? says Pierre 

Ready for what?  Where are we going? What dress should I wear?

Wear your jeans Helene, we are going clay target shooting at the National Riffle Club?

Oups! I guess there is still a little bit of rebel left in me and places where high hills will sink in the ground after all. I won’t wear my yellow shoes either, I don’t want to dirty them.  

Life is a Fairy Tale!

Your life is a Fairy Tale!

I must have received 25 emails after my wedding to tell me that my life is like a Fairy Tale. At first I was touched, felt lucky, I walked on a cloud looking at my prince that many of you call Big as a reference to the movie Sex and the City or Richard Geere, referring to the modern version of Cinderella; Pretty Woman!  The reality is that I am no Julia Roberts and even if Singapore is the best shopping place for shoes, I am no Cinderella nor Carrie Bradshaw.

Then I started to wonder; does life really need to be compared to fiction when it looks pretty good? Have we had it so rough that we only believe that happiness and beautiful endings are stories out of someone’s imagination or the product of a large Hollywood production.  When I say we, I mean “we” including me.  I sometimes doubt myself that it can be real or that the ending will be good.  I even caught myself being worried that something is going to fall from the sky on me, that something will come and jeopardize my happiness like a full cup of hot coffee dropped on my beautiful Fairy Tale book on a Sunday afternoon, just as I am about to read it. 

-In fact it is the other way around! Says Pierre to me while I was thinking out loud.  It is life that inspires movies or stories and too often we forget this.  

We sort of gotten use to see good stories as a quick fix of happiness while sitting in a movie theatre for 2 hours, before going back to real life. I remember the days where I booked happiness periods in my agenda at specific times because I was too busy taking care of problems.  I use to call them “Florida Afternoon” as if my head would go on vacation.  So today, I try to spend every minute (out of office hours) enjoying the best life has to offer. Of course it also means that we pay the bills at the end of the month.  We said Fairy, not Free!

But before I go further I should admit that after receiving the series of emails on my Fairy Tale life, I felt guilty, thinking that perhaps I am splashing my life to people thinking that they were ready or willing to hear it, or to see it.  I thought that perhaps it would be a pleasant moment in this depressing economy.  But now I am done with the guilt and the timidity (if I ever had any) and I am ready to continue laying the truth on the table: My life is a real tale and the truth is that I wrote and write every line of it myself, and I write it with Pierre.  Through this book of life I sometimes doubted, I often cried, I certainly faced many challenges and overcame a lot of ordeals in order to write it so today I am confident that this chapter is the most positive and happy one of my life. 

I can think of another person that seems always happy: my friend Jennie at the office.  Jennie has all the same challenges and sorrows we all have, but she deliberately chooses not to let it affect her.  She looks at all the positive things of life, she turns every statement into wonders and never let herself sweat or at least you never see her sweat. 

-I made that decision a long time ago Helene and it changed my outlook at life! Said Jenny one day to me after I asked her to tell me the secret of her constant happiness. 

- I did think she made a lot of sense, after all if you have your health, you have a job (or not, it is just sometimes better), if you have love and a home to go to at night, the rest of life is what you make of it! So until tomorrow when I get the result of my health screening check, I can fully live my life in confidence that I have it all and if my healthcare statement is all clear, I will have another full year ahead of me to organize more trips, more treks and more romantic evenings in beautiful Singapore!

Meanwhile, your testimonials gave us the idea of making our own memory book with all of our wedding photos.  A beautiful coffee table book that we will be able to consult page by page when life is less generous to us and perhaps then we will think:  WOW! This life was like a Fairy Tale.

Cheers la Vie!

A Birthday, an Anniversary, an Engagement, an MBA, Several Trips and a Wedding!

Cleaning up the sea

 

 

Do not worry, Pierre saved Nemo from a certain death!

 

 

 

 

 

OK Lah!

I admit it and mea culpa, I let you all down for the last three months!

 

Mind you, I am convinced that you were all busy wondering how much money you’ve lost on the stock market, worried about the future or scandalized by the lack of regulations of this beautiful financial structure.  Enough said, it is time for Good News and I have many of them! Take a break from your pain and enjoy the moment.

 The first good news is that last October I have reached the big 50.  How is this good news?  Well I strongly believe that it will be the best decade of my life and since the rumour is that today’s 50 is yesterday’s 30, I have nothing to fear.  On the night I reached the big fifty mark, I wrote the following:

That’s it!  Today I am saying goodbye to my forties.  I know that most people (at least women) would just lie about it, but I will tell it to the world….. Tonight, at midnight, on October 16, I will be 50 and loving every minute of it!

Funny enough, it was perhaps a big enough moment to write a blog, but frankly I am not bothered at all by this number, therefore I stopped writing right away.  I feel more alive and kicking than ever and more of a woman than I ever was and ever will be. I am 50 and yes I need more cream on my face, more vitamins in the morning, more walks not to crack bones, but on the upside, I need less sleep and I have less to prove. 

 I actually think that the fifties might become the best years of my life: I lived my dreams to the fullest, I am with the man of my life and I am full of new dreams to make come true.

 Two weeks after my birthday, it was our first anniversary together (of course I mean Pierre and me).  To celebrate both events, we went to a paradise place called Kapalai-Resort Sipadan, 30 minutes by boat from Borneo. The place was just magical.  Right there, in the middle of the sea with nothing else around, appeared this beautiful resort built on stilts!  If you wish to see this heaven, click on the You Tube link below.  Giant turtles like the one in the video use to come at our villa’s deck at night to hunt for food.  This place was a pure delight outside and inside the water.  We dove almost three times a day to see the most abundant creatures the sea can offer and walked on water at night to go for dinner.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkW4WS4W4u0 

On Saturday night, we were so tired from diving that we decided to rest for a while on the long chairs of our villa… looking out at the nothingness of the sea. Pierre looked a bit worried or stressed and I did not know why since we had such a great couple of days.  I then saw him getting up, go inside the villa and come back dressed.  I was in a swimsuit with a pareo over it and looked like someone who had a rough day of fun. The contrast was quite obvious between the two of us and I was puzzled for a second or two on what he was about to say.  Pierre sat down, looked at me seriously, made me almost nervous, pulled a small gift box and popped the big question!! 

I don’t remember answering because I was so shocked, pleased, overwhelmed by emotions and so happy all at once. Of course it meant yes!  At that moment, a giant turtle pulled out of the water at our deck as a beautiful sign of longevity!

 -Let’s POP the champagne Pierre said, we have a lot to celebrate now.  How about we come back here, in this paradise to get married?

-Yes, this would be a dream place to get married… right at the end of the pier and under the big pergola.

The villas of Sipadan Resort

You may guess by now that this is exactly what we will do on March 6, 2009: Getting married in Kapalai in the middle of the sea at sunset. How is that!

So now you know about the Birthday, the Anniversary, the Engagement, so now lets clear the way for the MBA.  I have been dragging my feet for the last five years to complete my @##?#$%&!! MBA and I did finish it last weekend.  I still have a formality to do next August but overall, IT IS BEHIND ME!  I cannot be happier that from now on, I will have a life. 

Happy Holidays to all of you!

I am going home in Montreal for Christmas with Pierre and will have a few things to talk about upon my return to Singapore… so stay tuned. 

Happy Holidays to all of you and we wish you the best for 2009

 

-Are you really sure Pierre? 

P.S: Did I mention that I am getting married?  3 times rather than one.  We are going to do a wedding in Montreal on December 24, one on March 6 in Kapalai and we have to remarry in Singapore to make it all legal! 

-No doubt Helene!

-Neither do I, but what date will be the one we celebrate?

We either celebrate them all or it will give us a second and third chance if we miss one over the years!

The things we do for love!

 

I DID IT!   I am now a PADI certified scuba diver in open water.  This means I can now fly high during the week and dive low on the weekend! What a contrast when you spend your days discussing business and then go see little Nemo with his clown face on your days off! But to tell you the truth, I did not get my open water certification at this time in my life because I am in a middle age crisis or because I need to prove anything to anyone… I did it for love… and perhaps as well to be consistent with my attitude of facing my fears.  But the first reason is definitely “I did it for love”.

 

 

Pierre has a true passion for diving and it is a lasting one for the last 30 years!   When I catch him with his eyes looking up at the ceiling and ask the stupid question of “What are you thinking about?” chances are he is thinking of the underwater world while his blood makes bubbly sounds!  Pierre wanted so much to share his passion with me that I was completely equipped before I even took the decision of jumping in the water to play the calamari.

 

Personally I never, never, never thought I would let myself be convinced of diving… Water is not or was not my element.  I am a Libra, a sign of air and a bit claustrophobic at times.  But Pierre is excellent in selling when he really wants something so he has been selling his diving ambitions with me for months.  When his daughter Virginie was visiting in July, the first thing they did is to go for days at Tioman Island in Malaysia, a small tropical heaven 35 flying minutes from Singapore, where they dove day and nights!!!  

 

-Pierre, do you mean NIGHT PITCH BLACK DIVING?

 

-Yes Helene and it is the best diving because some fishes are fluorescent in the light and things appear to you suddenly.

-Oh! Non merci! I am not there yet and I don’t know if I can ever be ready to dive in pitch-black water in the middle of the China Sea… or any seas for that matter. The thought of not seeing anything above and below stresses me out completely and diving is about having fun. So Pierre, I love you but… 

 

Pierre rapidly switches back the conversation to the beauty of the underwater world during daytime until one day I said: 

 

-All right, I will do it for you! 

Then I engaged in a long list of questions, fears, anguishes and all other emotions combined that Pierre bravely faced one by one with the patience of a wise man.  So much so that he went the opposite way and made it sound like diving is simpler than it really is.  He insisted on the fact that perhaps I do it for the love of him now but when the minute I will have a taste of the underwater world, I will do it for the love of diving!

 

When everything and all conditions are perfect, diving is really easy but I am not the type of person that can accept to only control things when they are going well; I AM IN CONTROL OF SITUATIONS AS MUCH AS I CAN…GOOD ONES or BAD ONES.  I need to know what are the risky situations so I can understand how I will react if and when they happen. Then I need to learn how to overcome these situations otherwise I will not relax and enjoy myself.  When I say understanding the risky situations, I don’t mean reading the PADI book of knowledge but I mean living the problems. Fortunately for me things did not go perfectly as planned during my sessions!!

 

My first open water dive went as planned and I succeeded all the exercises the first time around: Remove your mask at 50 feet underwater, lose and find your air regulator, pretend you run out of air and use your buddy’s equipment, bla bla bla or shall I say bubble, bubble, bubble.

 

My second dive was also on a good start since I succeeded well the simulation of a regulator malfunction by pressing the button for 30 seconds to freeflow the air and try to breath through the wild flow anyways.  All went well, so I got the underwater handshake from my instructor.  After this exercise, my instructor Arshad advised us with all the signs and bubbles he could use that we are going for a cruise of the bottom along the reef, for about 30 to 40 minutes. 

 

Good enough, here I follow my instructor full of trust and enthusiast to do my first bottom exploration.  After about 5 minutes of cruising I decided to look at my computer that I barely know as it will be part of tomorrow’s drill.  I may not know my diving computer well but I knew one thing:  I HAD 4 MINUTES OF AIR LEFT IN MY TANK.  It was my first time to be completely pissed off under water.  I followed right away the procedures that I had been taught when you reach a critical low air point, I grabbed Pierre’s attention and gave him the signal that I was about to run out of air.  Pierre looked at me with eyes that were enlarging every second of the minute and I saw him signal the instructor.  It was my instructor’s turn to do the big eyes with a bit of fear in it as we were 50 feet under water and he feared I was going to panic.  He signaled me to come closer to him and when I did, I started to ascend without control.  I did not want to ascend but I was inexperienced, too light on air and the combination of a low air tank and my positive buoyancy made me rise to the surface without control!!   I HATE NOT BEING IN CONTROL!!  One might think that when you are out of air, the idea of rising to the surface is a good one but it is your last resource and not your first one due to the possibility of decompression sickness.  Further more, you should do it with control and not because you have become an out of control air balloon.

 

 Of course at the surface the two guys had to hear me ventilate at them and making them responsible for the almost critical situation I was in.  They were the experts and my instructor should have known that the freeflow exercise would empty my tank!!  But after we finished shredding each other apart, I felt good about the event because I knew now what I should have known then.  Trust me, I will look at my computer every 5 minutes of a dive and I will insist on recreating situations that I must learn how to overcome. I also know that you are lighter at the end of your dive; hence you need to calculate your weight accordingly.

 

 The other dives were easy and great so I left with a smile on my face, certification in my hand and looking forward to another trip in a month’s time. Our next trip will have two celebrations: My 50^th birthday and my 1^st anniversary with Pierre, but this time in a paradise called Sipadan.  The Kapalai Resort of Sipadan, close to Borneo, is a resort of small luxurious huts on the water… in the water… nothing else around!!  You dive from the deck of your room… how cool is that!

 

 Malaysia, away from Kuala Lumpur, has some real treasures where you see as many things above the water than underwater.  In Tioman Island, the nice walk from the pier to the room was accentuated by the encounter of monkey families, big monitor lizards, bats the size of your cat (if you have one) and tons of gorgeous butterflies.  The virgin jungle of the rain forest is as wild as it gets and as rich in life as you can find.  At night, the sky was so black and the stars so many that it looked unreal.  At this moment Pierre turned around and said:

 

 -You see Helene, if we were diving right at this moment, you would be able to watch this magnificent sky from the sea while we would be floating in the sea water like two love fishes.

 -NON MERCI! I use to be a French frog, now I am a certified frog in Asia but I am still not ready to be a frog at sea waiting for a predator to order frog legs for his late dinner! I love you Pierre but….

Now I do it for the love of diving with you!

 

 

LN

 

P.S: My great friend Lorraine Klaasen is going to do a concert on September 25 at Club Soda.  DON’T MISS IT

http://www.yesmontreal.ca/yes.php

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I smell a blog!

-I smell a blog here Helene. I am sure you are planning to write about this!  Is the first thing Pierre said when I related to him the conversation I had with my colleagues at lunchtime last week.

At the table were my Thai, Taiwanese, New Zealander women colleagues and my Korean, Australian and Canadian (born in Arab countries) male colleagues.  The discussion turned around the fact that in most countries of Asia, the passport and your identity is not a matter of privacy.  In Singapore for instance, your passport and work permit numbers are required for just about everything: buying a phone card, getting your electricity or cable services, opening a bank account and even buying a television.  Anywhere you are interacting to consume, you are likely to be asked to provide these two pieces of information.  Anywhere in Asia they will take away and photocopy your passport when you check-in at a hotel or a resort.  These daily practices are enough to give you goose bumps when you are a North American born and raised in a world of privacy protection.

But in Asia discrimination is not a taboo and asking for your age, nationality, race and religion are standard questions in any forms you fill… even at work.  Are you married or single? How old are you? How much did you pay for this? What is your salary? What is your religion and race? are accepted standard procedures and no one gets offended by it.  Of course, at first, you are completely enraged that everyone practices such intrusion of your private life and if you don’t want to answer the questions, tough luck buddy, you won’t get your service or your goodies.

-I don’t think I can get use to this Helene! Said Pierre the first few times we traveled together.

-Oh!  Yes you will my dear, we all do and, believe it or not, I no longer get offended anymore.  So many people have photocopied my passport that I probably have clones all over the world by now!  And you know what? I really don’t care anymore… so be it.

Yes these sorts of culture clashes are found in your daily life on this side of the planet and you deliberately choose to make sense of it. When you see that the gorgeous girls of Singapore airlines are all under 30 years of age and have perfect figures, you enjoy the perfection part and you wonder what happens to their career when they gain weight, get pregnant or age?

-But Helene, they are the icon and the marketing brand of this fabulous airline company and quite frankly, as a client, it is very enjoyable to see these beautiful girls.  I would not want to be served by an out of shape old lady with an attitude like many airlines in Canada and the USA!

 This comment from my old colleague Patrick (did I mention that there are no women in the leadership team in Australia) made my skin crawl the first time I heard it; until I remembered how badly treated I was for years as a customer of Air Canada and thought perhap he had a point.

 Don’t worry guys, I am not totally brain washed and I still get chills in the spine when I think of discrimination, but I must admit that I do enjoy flying on the wings of the best airline in the world with the most fabulous competent women serving me with a large smile. I have stopped wondering how long they hope to work for the company, how they fit in this made to measure dress every day and how they do their hair buns so perfectly!  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singapore_Girl

In Asia, you must always remember with what eyes you are looking at things and prioritize in your mind the reasons why they are there or the reasons why you are here!  I am here to learn and discover the wonderful Asian culture, to experience the Asian phenomenon of rapid growth that is about to dominate the planet, to add a valuable international fold to my career and to live winter free.  Quite frankly Singapore and Asia gave me way more than what I bargained for.  It gives me a new outlook to life, it grounds me, calms me and teaches me that things can be accomplished with kindness and dignity; that humility is often more intelligent than boldness. It also taught me that dreams could come true.

But of course you cannot erase your fundamental values and your culture so it is an immediate shock when your profile is laid out to select or eliminate you as a candidate for a job or to get the right price when you purchase something. You are Caucasian, you pay a higher price…. period! On the upside, my negotiation skills have gone way up!

To my amazement, the minute I mentioned at the table that it is completely illegal in Canada to ask such questions openly to people, it is my two women colleagues that gave me an argument:

- But Helene, how do you eliminate the people you don’t want before you meet them?? Why would you select a woman or a gay to be a manager, it is terrible, they would be too emotional to do the job correctly and men would not want to work for them!!!! They could not take rational decisions.  It is good to know in advance if they are Muslim, Jewish, Catholic or Buddhist to know if they can fit with the team!!!!!

- Oh my God! Girls, I cannot believe I hear you say that.  I am an executive in this company and do you think that I cannot make rational business decisions?

-Ya! But you….

 -No ya but me here girls. And you tell me that you ask “single or married” to try to see if people would be gay?? Who cares whom this person sleeps with at night?  If I can do the job, I should be hired regardless of my personal profile. So you tell me that you prefer to work for gays that got married and live a double life so it is acceptable at work. Don’t you think that his (her) chances of being emotional, depressed or unhappy are greater if he (she) cannot be himself? 

- Yes I prefer, I could not work for a gay guy or gay women, it would disrupt the team and our work!!!  

My girlfriend from New Zealand barged in and reinforced my thoughts with the fact that this would also be illegal in Australia and New Zealand.  I was glad to hear that but I do not see women in the leadership team in these countries either, so I can only guess that it is an unspoken rule.  At least in Asia, it is “no hiding” the truth!!  More so in a Japanese culture base company. It is not a glass ceiling that you have when you are a woman, it is a solid black roof above your head. Thank God I did not come here in hope of becoming a vice-president because I would slightly be disappointed. Even if I am in Singapore, I work for a Japanese company. When you talk about having women in the leadership team, they start laughing nervously and say “nooooo” cannot! 

-So! My dear Korean colleague, what is your thought on this?  Last time I was in Korea, I did not see more than 4 women in the office, out of a couple of hundred peoples!  With a shy smile and a very polite tone, the Korean man answered:

-Ohhhh!  In Korea, it is still a very male dominating culture and women are not considered for long time work and are given smaller jobs because they will get married.  A woman’s place is still at home, like in Japan. 

-Would you work for women?

He lowered his eyes and started laughing in a cute shy way.  He did not have to answer the question because I already knew the answer but I wanted to see the cute shy smile. It reminded me of the Japanese marketing manager in Malaysia who reports to a woman.  One night I asked him how he felt when he landed last year and found out he was going to work for a woman?  His answer surprised me because his boss (the she in question) was sitting right next to him when he said “she’s cute”!  I then told him that she was very intelligent as well but he could not admit it and kept on repeating that she is cute and that he talks directly to the managing director above her. 

CULTURAL CLASHHHHHH!  Is what was resounding in my mind and I could see the same thought in the eyes of my Canadian fellow.

Yet Chinese people in Singapore, Shanghai and Beijing treat women and men pretty equally like we would in Canada and we increasingly see women in management positions. They are very entrepreneurial, quick in business and very “go getters” once the trust and relationships are established.  During my recent trip to Shanghai, I was stunned to see how many women were in leading positions (thought it was unique to Singapore) with a bright smile, a witty brain and an affirmative personality.  You go girls!   They speak English, Mandarin and many other Chinese dialects, so I could just imagine what a brilliant future they will shape for themselves.

After lunch, my Thai and Taiwanese colleagues were still shaking their heads saying “they cannot imagine a world where you cannot discriminate to make your choices” and they completely accept this fact with the conscious knowledge that there are other ways.  Quite frankly I am surprised of how I even accept many things and many discriminations that I would have never tolerated while in Canada.

Open discrimination is so much more powerful than you that you stop fighting after a while and adapt.  It is a bit tiring to stay on the wrong side of the road all the time without changing lane.  It is now normal for me to have my photo, my electronic finger and iris prints taken at many customs in airports and it is business as usual to give my passport number to the point where I carry a photocopy of my ID at all time.  How many of you know their passport number by heart and its expire date.  Go ahead, don’t look and say it out loud!

Then I faced my own concept of discrimination.  Last week in Germany I was taking care of a few clients when came this couple from Indonesia.  He was dressed in a traditional Muslim costume and her, completely veiled… you could only see her vivid eyes.  I saw many veiled women in Indonesia and Malaysia before this one, but I never had to spend time and discuss business with them. My past interaction with veiled woman was to watch them walk by and look at them with amazement that someone would be kept in a state of hiding for her entire life. Every veiled woman was to me a sign of repression and domination and I must admit that it is still hard for me to admit that women would be covered and can never live the pleasure of being looked at by anyone else than her husband and immediate family… to get the look that boost our ego and helps us build some of our self-confidence.

I deliberately sat next to her at dinner and to my pleasant surprise, I had the greatest time.  She was a ball of energy, a true businesswoman, sharp, funny and full of self-confidence.  She was very open-minded and I felt with her the same as I would feel with any of you.  My mind was constantly going back and forth fighting my prejudice and at the end of the night, I wished I could spend more time with her.  Walking out of the restaurant we were still laughing while I watched all these eyes staring at us with a puzzled face. You cannot see two greater extremes than me and a veiled Muslim woman walking and almost hugging on the streets of Dusseldorf.  

I had not ask her age but her religion was obvious, I did not know her salary but her nationality was written on the guest list, I did not know her passport number nor her address and yet my Canadian eyes had started to cheat me the minute I saw her and almost discard her prior to even speaking with her.  Then I thought: Discrimination comes in all shapes or forms and perhaps the worst kind is the hidden one; the unspoken one, the one we veil in our daily lives and pretend it does not exist.

 

Fun facts:  This morning when I was reading the daily newspaper of Singapore, I saw this very “a propos” ad in the classified:

Urgent, for sale, condominium 1000sq feet, 1.8 million, any races accepted  !!!!!!

Santé! The joy of being sick in a 5 star health care system.

Pauline Chan, my gorgeous Montreal-Chinese now Singaporean friend who I now almost call sister, wrote to me the minute I posted my blog last week.

-Helene, you mentioned that you would speak about the health care system of Singapore and this time I wish to contribute to your blog. I will call you later to discuss this because I don’t have time to ellabiorate; I have to have a surgery this morning. They offered me last week but I was too busy so I chose this Monday instead! Oh! And by the way Helene, I am the one who told you to go to the International clinic and not your colleague Paul at the office.

-Oups! Sorry Pauline, you gave me the phone number of the international clinic, but in fact, Paul sent me there. I guess health is a serious topic with a “0″ tolerance in your family.

-But Pauline, I am surprised you want to talk about diseases and hospitals when you switched to text message instead of live phone calls on the day you found out I had mononucleosis and pneumonia! As if you could catch it talking to me over the phone!!

-I know Helene, isn’t that strange that I acted this way?? Anyways I got to go, the doc is waiting for me.

You might find it odd that we can actually choose the day of our surgery in Singapore or perhaps think that Pauline got lucky to have her surgery date so quickly, or even think that she has special network connections in the medical domain, but no… for us in Singapore it is business as usual.

My amazement with the health care system of Singapore started last September when I needed to find an Endocrinologist as a follow-up to the surgery I had in July, just before I left Canada. My only reference on the finding of such a specialist was in Montreal, two years ago, when I became ill and my GP suspected it had to do with my thyroid or parathyroid. He then told me:

-I will refer you to an Endocrinologist and my secretary will call to get you an appointment.

-Thank you doc! This seems simple enough.

The secretary was a bit more explicit:
-I will call to say you need an appointment and they will call you back within 10 months to a year to get you an appointment, which could take another year!
-TWO YEARS BEFORE I SEE THE SPECIALIST? What do I do if it is a tumor like they suspect? What if the current decalcification of my bones gives me osteoporosis at an early age if it is not stopped soon? What if…
-Sorry Mam but this is a” take it or leave It” sort of thing so what do you want me to do; call or not call?

10 months later they still had not called me back for an appointment and my health was deteriorating. I went back to see a doctor for something else and begged him:
-I am leaving for Singapore in two months and I am so worried, I don’t know what the health care system is like over there, I am afraid that it will not be of quality and If I need surgery, I will have no one to help me in Singapore, no support.

He felt very sorry and pulled a couple of strings. He sent me to his great assistant Natalina (cover up for the real name because I don’t want her to be blamed for helping me) who knows the who’s who of the hospital:

-Ms Blanchette I can get you an appointment next month with an Endocrinologist because I know the girl who takes the appointments!

-You are my savior Natalina and I will never forget you (I really won’t).

A month later I was sitting in what looked like the office of a war hospital with furniture of the fifties and the  “salmon and green paint peeling off the wall look”, which characterizes most Canadian hospitals. Piles of non-filed papers were lying on the desk of the secretary who did not dare to look at me once, even though I was the only one in her office. All I could think of is: How could I get my file on top of the pile?!
The entire place looked filthy and yet, I was in the biggest hospital of Montreal. For a reason I still cannot figure out, the girl hated me before I even opened my mouth. She wanted to let me know that she has power in this hospital section and she will certainly use this power if she has the opportunity. I was the opportunity: after all, I was sick and weak and, dam me, I needed her help.

Good enough, after my Endocrino doc told me I needed surgery very soon, he said:

-Go see my secretary and she will try to use magic tricks to get you into surgery before your departure for Singapore.
-YOU MEAN HER???
-Yes!

I felt as if I was in a TV show such as “Twin Peaks” or a Hitckok film; the machiavellian secretary who will try to kill me before the end of the movie!

Good enough, while the doctor was in the vicinity, she smiled and said that she will call her connections and advise me on Monday of the surgeont’s availability. She never called, never returned any of my 6 desperate voice messages and never took care of it. Power she had and power she used… just the wrong way. Three weeks prior to my departure for Singapore I was panicking, a tumor hooked on my parathyroids and now almost two years had gone by without getting the proper treatment.

In desperation I called Natalina again and begged her for help… and she came through! I had my surgery one week before I left. But a few hours before surgery, a medical error caused by the preparation team of the hospital forced the doctor to perform a more serious operation than expected. Never the less, the tumor was out and a week later I was leaving for Singapore.

So here I was, 2 months later in Singapore having to repeat the same trauma: FINDING AN ENDOCRINO THAT WILL BE KIND ENOUGH TO ACCEPT ME AS A PATIENT. Here in Singapore I have no connections and no Natalina, but I had also no choice.

My friend Jennifer who lived in Singapore and also had thyroid problems told me that she had found one of the best specialists of the country (or city).

-Go see a GP and ask for a referral for this endocrinologist.

Hearing that made me think of the long process and frustration I will need to engage to carry this mission, but I have no choice so here I go to the nearest clinic to take a number and wait in line…. for 2 minutes!  May I remind you that Singapore holds 5 million people?!

-Hi Doc Wong! I am here to get a referral to see this great Endocrinologist so can you help me?
-Sure says the doctor, let me call for you.
-How is tomorrow 9h30 am for you Miss Blanchette?
-Tomorrow? What do you mean tomorrow? I cannot make it at 9h30 tomorrow.
-All right then, when would you like to go?
-When do I want to go??? Wow!

2 days later I showed up at the Gleneagles hospital. I was first impressed by the surroundings and the clean well kept look of this older hospital. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gleneagles_Hospital_and_Medical_Centre

The first thing I hear at the doctor’s office is this joyful and smiley nurse saying:
-Hi Ms Blanchette, we were waiting for you so please come and sit down and another nurse will come to you, take a sample of your blood and the doctor will see you in 90 minutes with the results in his hands. I think it will be a better use of your time this way. You can leave and go walk in the park, but please be back at 11:00 am. Where are you from? She genuinely asked with the largest smile available.

-From Canada.

-Ah! that is why you have a French accent, are you from Montreal? (How do they know so much about the other side of the world??)

At 11:00 am, after a beautiful walk in the botanical garden of Singapore among swans and palm trees, I walked in the office again:
-No time to sit, Ms Blanchette, says the smile on two legs, the doctor is ready for you!

The doctor, a very competent one too, had my blood test results in his hand and was in deed waiting for me, shaking my hand as I walked in. After examination, he completed the visit by:

-Please go see my secretary; I want to see you again in two weeks and she will also help you finalize the bill.

Ouch! I forgot I have to pay; it is free in Canada!

-How much do I owe you miss?

-Well today is your first visit so there is a file preparation fee, the blood test and rushed results and also the doctor’s fee so it will be more expensive: The total is $200 Sing dollars ($160 cdn) + 7% tax.

I must have heard wrong, this is not expensive enough, in Canada the health care system cost the government (hence its citizens) way more than this. This cannot be!

Two weeks later, I showed up on time at my follow-up appointment. Again; the smile, the doctor waiting, etc. and the bill came to: $26.95 ($20 cdn) for my visit with the specialist.
-$26.95?????
-Yes miss Helene, we made a special for you today because the real price is $56
-You mean that in Singapore Doctors go “on sale”??
-Do they have seasons, or boxing day too?
-No, we just like you.

Her smile got even bigger and just burst out laughing:
-Can your insurance reimburse you?

-Of course they will, but quite frankly I won’t loose sleep if I misplace the receipt!

-Why, is Canada’s health care expensive?

-Actually no, it is free, but the price to pay is high: You wait in emergencies for 8 to 12 hours on a good day, you stay in corridors for days with no dignity, trying to see a specialist can take months or years, getting surgery is a lottery ticket and if you come out of it OK, you may have contracted the C-difficile bacteria that is everywhere in hospitals. You don’t want to be sick in Canada or at least, not in Quebec. It is full of good people who have lost their faith, laughter, ideology and passion. The equipment is old, hospitals are really badly kept, often dirty and you have to go to private clinics if you wish for a bit of efficiency. Even there… a treatment can take up to a month or two and the cost…well more than here let’s say!
-Too bad for people there! But anyways, when do you want to see the doctor next?

I just love hearing that! It is music to my ears.

My recent health challenges of February and March with Pneumonia and Microplasma infections have lead me to many hospital visits. The first of these visits was in Canada for a prescription renewal and because I am no longer a resident, I had to pay $65 cdn ($100 SGD) to see a tired and stressed doctor for less than 5 minutes, after waiting for 3 hours.
Yet, back in Singapore I went down a long list of tests recommended to ensure they will carry the right diagnostic and all of it in the fastest turnaround time ever. I never waited more than 2 minutes in a waiting room (too bad because the waiting rooms are luxurious, comfortable and all equipped with internet stations to continue your business while waiting. See photo above).

At the Raffles hospital, a full annual screening test cost $425 SGD ($340 CDN ) and a hotel like buffet is available “for free” when you have your half time break in the morning. You have a choice of croissants or bakeries accompanied with freshly squeezed orange juice or apple juice.
-Coffee? Latte or Espresso?

A nice helper follows you around while you go through your tests to ensure you are not wandering around everywhere to search for the right doors.  Along the way, she introduces you to all the different staff that is joking and exchanging with their peers, WAITING FOR PATIENTS. Yet, we were hundreds of clients that day, but they succeeded to process us with grace in such an efficient way that they had time for a couple of jokes between two patients. An X-Ray is $32.50 and takes “in and out” of the hospital less than 5 minutes, the equipment is always the latest technology and the decor is worthy of mention.

The Raffles hospital (http://www.raffleshospital.com/virtual_tour_location.html) is one of the  private hospitals of Singapore and displays an automated Grand piano in the middle of its gigantic marble lobby. It is there to entertain passing by patients and visitors; the decor is the equivalent of a 5 star hotel. As for the staff, they are always available to help you in the most professional way. The process works like a clock; here you don’t feel sick, you feel important! You are not a patient… you are a client!

If you ever get tempted, they have an international section and people from all over the world are flying-in to get treated like real human beings.

I experienced dozens of tests, met at least 5 GPs and 4 specialists, always at the time and date I chose. The last one was an urologist and I booked the appointment 24 hours ahead of time. He too shooked my hand as if it was a business meeting and thanked me for my trust. At the end he asked me if I was pleased with his service. Oh! I almost forgot to mention that 24 hours after any treatments or visits, you receive an SMS with a satisfaction survey question: Were you pleased by the efficiency and the competence of the service you received yesterday?

-So Miss Blanchette, is that how I should pronounce your name?
-Yes, you are good.
-So the total for: the 5 X-rays of this morning, the urine tests and blood tests, the doctor’s visit and the 3 weeks of antibiotics is $358 SGD.
-Thank you, where do I sign?
-Can I shake the doctor’s hand again?
-No worries, the doctor will call you tomorrow if the other results have something to show.
-I have never been worried one minute; I know very well that I am in good hands here.

Many of these great doctors called me at home at night, discussed my situation with me, apologized for disturbing me at home and carried on with a comforting attitude to explain some of their concerns while offering detailed possible solutions to my problems.

Seated in a Singapore airline Boeing 777 on my way to Shanghai, weeks after these experiences, I am still impressed by their attitudes and the way they made me feel I was in great hands. They demonstrated many times over how much they cared for human beings.

The non-private hospitals are as good here, so the less fortunate are not left behind. The government of Singapore has recently launched a new comprehensive health care program that should make everyone else think twice. It is a progressive coverage aligned with your income level. For example, if you earn less than $30,000 a year, health care services are completely free; coverage will reduce to according to your level of earnings and your choice of treatment. For expatriates like me, it is either my work insurance that covers it or I pay directly the hospital.

Last week, trough a yearly routine check-up, doctors suspected Annabelle (my house keeper) to have been exposed to tuberculosis as a young adult and that the virus is still dormant in her blood.

-She is not contagious and cannot transmit the disease the doctor says, but one day, when she is older and weak, the virus could reactivate itself and she would be very ill, likely to die from it if she does not have the proper care.
-We can thoroughly test her and engage in a preventive tri-therapy for 6 months to ensure she never develops the disease for the rest of her life, but this will be costly miss Blanchette
-I don’t mind, Pierre and I will pay for the preventive treatment because we both know that she will never be able to afford it later, when the disease decides to activate its destructive path.

The 4 major tests she needed to follow at the Tang Tok Seng Hospital totaled $650 SGD and she now needs a daily-supervised treatment at the clinic where they administrate the medication. The pills are free, paid in part by the government of Singapore. She will need to see the specialist every two weeks for $80 so all together, in six months, it will have cost us about $2500 SGD. Not that much for a human being’s future.

Meanwhile, in Canada, a friend of mine needed surgery, but the wait list was very long. He turned to the private sector and was willing to pay the $16,000 required. They could operate on him within 2 months. My friend was ecstatic about it. Unfortunately, last week he found out they could not do it at the private clinic and needed a hospital environment to pursue this surgery. He is now on a waiting list and hope to get his operation in 18 to 24 months!

A week later my mom was hospitalized for 4 or 5 days. When I tried calling her over Mother’s day, the phone would ring endlessly. I found out that it was because the phones are old, the cables dried and wires were badly connected. My brother fixed the phone and when I finally spoke to her and realised she was getting better, I could not resist to ask her:
-Mom, could you describe your hospital room for me?

With her happy but weak voice, she answered:

-It is filthy, old and the walls are peeling off salmon and green large chips of paint. But I have a new cotton curtain between my neighbor and me!

When I hung up the phone with my mom, I called back Pauline to ask her what she wanted to say in my blog:

-Well Helene, the service is fabulous, the facilities are gorgeous, the doctors are competent, the staff is smiley and not stressed and it was a very enjoyable and surprising experience.

-Well Pauline, you just resumed in 3 lines what took me an entire blog to describe! I like the way your mind works.

-How is your mouth after the surgery?

-I am fine, thanks for asking. Right now I have a swollen lip like Angelina Jolie.

-Pauline, weren’t you gorgeous enough as it is?

-It was not plastic surgery Helene, it was a cyst, and please don’t make me laugh, it hurts.

- All right then, I will send you a text message, in case laughing is contagious!

Sante! Cheers!

The World is Small When your Taxi is a Boeing 747 or an Airbus 380!

 

 

Sitting on the upper deck of the Airbus 380 en route for Singapore from a week of business in beautiful Sydney Australia, I cannot stop thinking that life can really be what you make it when you have your health.  Next will be Shanghai after landing a couple of days in Singapore, then Tokyo, Düsseldorf in Germany, and then…. Canada for my summer vacation!  Yes I am planning to spend 20 days in Canada (from June 28 to July 17) for a well-deserved vacation prior to coming back with Pierre who has taken the brave decision of leaving everything behind him to move permanently to Singapore. Dreaming of a new life has something so exciting and motivating, yet doing it for real takes courage and determination.  Pierre is a man of real substance.

 

-Pierre, perhaps you should go for few days diving in Malaysia or Indonesia with your daughter Virginie while I go to Korea for a few days on business at the end of July.

 

Spontaneously Pierre answered:

-You will go on a business trip while I am in Singapore? 

-But of course Pierre, you will always be there so I guess I will have to continue doing my business trips even if you are around!!!!

 

He burst out laughing as he realized that, for a moment, his mind had played a trick on him forgetting that he will be in Singapore permanently and not just for 2 weeks as usual.

-You won’t be leaving this time and that is such a cool thought! 

 

Since the last time I wrote to you I traveled a lot:  Hong Kong was a fantastic highlight for both Pierre and myself and if you happen to go there, don’t miss the symphony of lights at night.  To see an entire city vibrating with music and glittering with lights to proudly introduce each building that compose its core downtown area, is really something.  Hong Kong is a beautiful vibrant city; too bad for the heavy air pollution that would keep me up coughing at night if I ever lived there.  

 

A weekend of indulgence in the Banyan tree resort in Bintan Indonesia was also a “nice to have” in our busy agendas.  The real beauty of it is the fact that all we need do to get to this paradise island is to take a 45-minute comfortable ferry ride from Singapore and there you are!!  A little paradise island with beaches and villas, a place where you do not have to stare at hundreds of gigantic ships parked at sea…a great relief for the eyes of Singaporeans.  A banyan tree is this magnificent big and wide tree that keeps growing roots from its branches and connect back to the ground.  It is also called the eternal tree because it keeps on growing while the roots are supporting the new branches.  Yet, the latest horrible disaster to hit Burma and took the lives of 100,000 of those gentle smiley people has also seen giant Banyan trees being beheaded by the strong winds as if they were toys; so I guess eternity can come to an end when God breaths too hard. 

 

In February, without telling many of you, I did a surprise trip to America.  After all, it was my turn to visit with Pierre, so California here I come.  I landed in San Francisco and stayed a few days, but not without experiencing a bit of a cultural shock.  Surrounded for many months by the kindness and peaceful approach of the Asians, I had grown accustomed to soft talks and friendly service and there I was landing in the heart of the loud and aggressive talkers: North Americans can be stressful in their approach to every day life, even in San Francisco, one of my favourite cities in the USA.  From the staff at airline companies, the client at the rent-a-car service who banged his fist on the counter thinking he owns the world and almost ready to pull a gun to teach the clerk a lesson, to the people walking on the street with stressful looks, I kept on wondering why they had to have an attitude.  Perhaps unions and individualism are to be blamed for it but it seems that they forgot they are in the hospitality business, that clients are their bread and butter or that things can be accomplished without screams, condescendence or arrogance. 

 

The guilt of being on the same continent as my family and friends without visiting them took the better of me and before long, Pierre had planned to hop on a plane to Montreal where we stayed for about 5 days before heading back to Sausalito and the fabulous Muir forest with its tall and peaceful redwood trees.

 

I must admit that it felt really great to see my family and friends, but also very odd. It was so easy and comfortable that I felt as if I had never left. Something in me started to grow afraid that I had just awakened from a dream, that this whole thing of Singapore and Asia was gone.  Suddenly I felt as if I was back in time and had dreamed my last 8 months.  But fortunately, seeing for the first time the small cute yellow ski house Pierre had recently rented in Sutton for his daughter and us made me realize that this was not my past life but rather my future.

 

Upon my return in Singapore I started to feel ill, a bad cold the doctor said:

 

-You are no longer used to this cold weather of Canada, I guess Ms Blanchette you will have to stay in Singapore from now on!

 

-That is a cool thought too!

 

But after three weeks of loosing strength and being really sick, I could see my general practitioner becoming as worried as Pierre who could witness my health deteriorating daily via Skype, feeling helpless.  But Pierre insisted on me changing doctor, going to get tested at the hospital and my colleague Paul at the office sent me straight to the international clinic when he saw me trying to work in this condition.

 

I ended up having a full package of diseases: a rare case of mycoplasma pneumonia and mononucleosis along with an e-coli infection.  A nice soup of germs and virus had invaded my body and were slowly taking over my health, killing me slowly for weeks without being detected. 

 

-The remedy for the soup of germs  is a cocktail!  Says the very competent Dr. Ru, a female doctor at the Singapore International Clinic. A cocktail of antibiotics that made me very sick while I was curing. 

Now, after 8 weeks of thinking I will never get better again and never be able to enjoy life to its fullest, thinking that life was going to take me away because I had made my dreams come true as if I needed to be punished to dream high and make it happen: I kept on thinking that I have many other dreams that I must realize before I go and that I did not want my friends to be saying in my Eulogy: She followed her dreams and at the moment she was about to taste it to the fullest she got sick.  I was thinking to myself that I had just started this fabulous relationship and that it cannot be taken away from me before I truly experience it

 

But now I am alive and kicking better than ever.  My health, my strength and my appetite are back. I know that without health, no dreams can be lived, but with it the world is yours.  I also know that without the great moral support Pierre gave me on a daily basis from the other side of the planet, I would have just laid there and be good for garbage. I also know that when he landed in Singapore in April and we left to Phuket and Phi-Phi Islands for a nice rest, it made my spirit shift for the better and that day I was on my way to recovery.

 

I also remember precisely how I got so sick: I was sitting on a plane from Korea next to a woman from Delhi who was so sick that I wondered how she succeeded to get on board the plane from California to Singapore (the plane from San Francisco hubs over to Seoul where I got on board).  The woman was coughing constantly without a mask.  She was weak to a point where I felt really uncomfortable to be next to her and moved to another seat… too little too late! As for the e-coli infection, remember the beautiful Bintan resort?  We used the whirlpool under the stars or should I say we bathed in a soup of germs under the stars!!  I know I should have not, but your words are too little too late!

 

Through this ordeal, I had the privilege of being sick in the amazingly efficient health care system of Singapore: A 5 stars system worthy of dedicating an entire blog article.  I could not stop comparing the system and treatments to the ones of Canada.

Human beings accept situations when there are no comparisons and believe politicians and health care authorities when they blame and shoot at everyone to excuse the conditions of our hospitals and its management.  Let me dedicate my next blog to this topic of hospitals and health care comparison. Trust me you will feel sick knowing how you have been treated like #@$???!! (censored) all these years and are paying a high price for it. 

 

Since I neglected you for months and have let down my readers, I will give you a double treat and post my next blog within few days of this one.

 

Meanwhile I will leave you thinking that the world is small when your taxi is a Boeing 747 or an Airbus 380!

 

 

 

Dreaming of a Green Christmas: When life becomes a Hallmark moment!

When I decided to spend Christmas in the lush hot tropical climate of Singapore, I was making a conscious decision of being consistent with my desire of fully experiencing other cultures and traditions. I wanted to understand how I would react to being alone, without snow, cold weather and family. I had lived 48 years of traditional white Christmas surrounded by loved ones and friends so no big deal to have one green one! I was looking forward to this new experience.

 

I am sure I have told you before that Singapore has 4.8 million people on 700 sq.miles of natural and reclaimed land, and that this country-city is composed of 80% Chinese, 15% Malaysian and Indian descendants, completed with 5% expatriates; in other words we are about 200 to 300 thousands Caucasians. During the Holiday Seasons, there was 80% Chinese, 15 % Malaysian and Indian descendants and ONE Caucasian….. me!

 

To be fair, there were two other expatriates in town: my dear friends Patrick and Pauline. They, their 2 children and Annabelle gracefully played the role of my little family on December 24. I must say that I had a Green Christmas at 30 degrees Celsius with a full moon as a bonus! You may see the pictures at the following web address: http://gallery.mac.com/prouleau/100155

 

The month prior to the Holiday Season, nothing felt like Christmas. Neither Pauline nor I felt the growing excitement, the need to get into the Christmas shopping spree or the stress related to its preparation. Yet, the shopping streets of Singapore had deployed one of the most beautiful and elaborate Christmas display we had ever seen. Chinese people love shopping and sharing so Christmas is just another great opportunity to do just that! Who really cares about the tradition and religion, after all Christmas in Asia and America is about one thing; SHOPPING! The Asians’ favourite activity.

 

I did not mind this distant feeling and detachment about Christmas until Pierre (my life partner who had gone to Montreal to celebrate Christmas with his daughter and family) decided to torture me by using a webcam and Skype! He went outside to shovel the beautiful white snow of the Eastern Townships while I was watching him on Skype through his laptop. He wanted to show me how Christmas in the snow would be like.

 

Once inside, he made sure I would see the picturesque snow falling through the window and turned on the fireplace to make me feel missed. The vision of the snow and Pierre made me melt inside. He succeeded, for a BRIEF moment, to make me want to hop on the next plane back to Montreal…. but I resisted! My great friend Nicole, her husband Daniel and Pierre himself were all coming to Singapore in a few days to celebrate the New Year with me so no need to feel sorry for myself, I am a big girl and I can wait!!!

 

Determined to recreate a real Christmas spirit for the children, Pauline bought the most sought after item in Singapore in December: a natural Christmas tree at Ikea! My big participation was to buy a Christmas log cake (they make beautiful Christmas log cakes here).

Pauline is a Chinese born beauty raised in Montreal. She is also a real Chef! My other Singapore Canadian friend Jennifer (who use to work at Readers Digest in Singapore, but since returned to Canada) photographed Pauline’s gorgeous Chinese look to do the promotion of the latest Readers Digest recipe book. An instant success and an instantaneous increase in sales for RD. Pauline rocks!

 

Since Pauline is a Chef, she is the one who cooked everything for the Christmas Eve diner and as for me…… I talked!

-Helene why don’t you come in the kitchen and talk to me. Sure Pauline, that I can do and I think I am a Chef at it!!

Annabelle was also around to play the real role of sous-chef in the kitchen so no room for a third violin. Duck comfit, roasted potatoes with Herbes de Provence and many other great French recipes were pulled out of Pauline’s Montreal Chinese hat to compose a great Christmas diner. Patrick had turned the tropical apartment into a freezer by lowering the air con to a minimum and blamed it on the survival of the Christmas tree (I do not like air conditioning). We now had all the ingredients to recreate a real Christmas: the freezing cold temperature, a great family reunion, enough gifts to cover half of the apartment’s floor, a few young children and a Christmas log!!

 

-Oh my God Helene, did you bring a Christmas music CD?

-Oh my God Pauline, NO! (I don’t even have one in Montreal)

-I think I have an old one somewhere.

 

Pauline went into her magic box and pulled one out. Christmas was saved by Pauline’s magic wand and we found ourselves holding on all night to the few Christmas songs we had found, as if they were gold!

 

At 43 years old, it was Annabelle’s first real Christmas! Although she is Christian, very religious and from the Philippines, Annabelle worked for Chinese people most of her life and when she started to work for expatriates, they would leave her behind to go home to their respective countries. I had no idea that she had never lived a true Christmas Eve and never expected that Annabelle would create a true Hallmark Christmas moment.

 

Few days prior to the Big Day, Annabelle and I had gone shopping for Pauline and the kids’ gifts. During the search for the perfect gifts, surrounded by millions of people who had the same idea, I caught through the corner of my eyes Annabelle trying a pair of shoes. She was looking at them with envy and placing them back on the shelve with a sad desire in her eyes. A couple of days later, I went back to the same store, purchased them and wrapped them as fast as I could because Annabelle knows every corner of the house and notices any new items. On the Eve of Christmas, the kids proceeded with excitement to open their gifts and then it was Pauline’s turn and then Patrick, then me. Suddenly, the kids brought two big wrapped boxes as gifts for Annabelle; huge Tobleron bars! Annabelle was stunned.

 

-A gift for me? From the kids? Look Mom, I got a gift!!

Then Pauline and Patrick offered her a beautiful assortment of beauty products and Annabelle had a hard time believing that it could be hers. She was floating on a cloud. We all unwrapped our gifts and picked-up the mess until only one gift was left under the tree. Pauline’s youngest son took the wrapped gift and said: It is for you Annabelle!

-What do you mean, how could it be? For me??

She opened the box slowly and saw her shoes. Annabelle was speechless and started to jump up and down, cry and scream of joy. She put them on and looked like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.

 

I went on to the balcony to get a bit of warmth outside as much as I felt inside and called Pierre in Montreal. Patrick joined me and said: Look-up Helene it is the full moon and look also at all the stars in the sky. I looked-up through the large palm trees to see and seize this perfect moment.

 

In the taxi heading back home, Annabelle and I were very quiet. Annabelle broke the silence by saying:

 

-You know Mom, I think God finally showed me that he exists.

-Really Annabelle… Why and How?

-I have prayed every night for months for four wishes to come true and he granted three of them to me.

• Which ones Annabelle?

• Well, I wished for my daughter to continue her school that I worked so hard to pay. I spent everything I earned to send her to school for the last 2 years in order to give her a chance in life; I don’t want her to have a maid’s life. Lately I was really scared because a man, who wanted to marry her, courted her to convince her to follow him in his country. She called me tonight to say that she refused his proposal because she wanted to finish her studies. I was so proud of her because most girls in my country would have taken the way out.

• The second wish was to have a gift at Christmas and I did! I never celebrated Christmas before.

• The 3^rd one was that My Sir Pierre would come back with us before the end of the year and you just told me that he was coming for December 30^th.

-How can my wishes all come true if there is no God Mom? He listened to me and my prayers.

I looked at her for a moment in silence, thinking that this great little lady had spent all her faith and time to hope and out of three wishes, two were concerning others. Then a thought crossed my mind, it is not three wishes she said at the beginning, she said four!!

-What is the fourth one Annabelle?

-I can’t tell you Mom because it is not yet the time and I cannot take the risk of telling.

I have some ideas on what the fourth one is, but I won’t share it in case I jeopardize her chances of getting her wish granted by God.

 

Meanwhile, Annabelle was my true gift for Christmas and I could not recall having lived such a picture perfect Holiday moment… even if there was no snow falling from the sky. I now understand the real meaning of Christmas and it is not only about shopping.

 

Although Annabelle was my Christmas gift and a true gem, I must say that I was just like her with her shoes when on New Year’s Eve, Pierre pulled out of his magic white Christmas box a stunning pearl necklace and earing set.

Terima kasih Bali – Matur Suksma Ubud

MISS BALI et Madé, melting-pot-blog.jpg, Julie and Helene Bangkok, darling-port.jpg, signage at temple, children dancers Bali, Boat lady in Bangkok, bali-temple.jpg, hbconference2.jpg, rice-fields-bali.jpg, hbconference-1.jpg, bali-hb-and-volcano.jpg, basket-lady-bali.jpg, beach-boats-bali.jpg, best-pad-thai.jpg, Sirroco Bar, brother-and-i-sunset-bali.jpg, cheers.jpg, flood-bangkok.jpg, fete-low-rez.jpg, market-bangkok.jpg, Monk introduction, temple in Singapore at night, pb-low-rez.jpg, pierre-helene-self-picture.jpg, Helene praying Bangkok, purification in water bali, dancing-children-bali.jpg, sarong-colours-bali.jpg, rice-pate-fields-bali.jpg, smelling-flowers.jpg, tean-with-i-made.jpg, the-glow.jpg, Aboriginals Sydney, bridge-of-sydney.jpg, circular-quay-sydney-1.jpg, downtown-view.jpg, My current boss is leaving to Australia, Singapore team in Sydney, Famous Opera house of Sydney, walk-in-sydney.jpg, signage at the entrance of temple Bali, circular quay-sydney-1.jpg,

Before I start this new post I owe everyone an explanation on my silence for the last 2 months:  I had a major hardware problem with my new laptop that was followed by a complete crash of my operation system. I know many of you wondered what had happened to me and kindly sent me emails to request new postings, so I have to explain that my technology challenges made me lose my computer for a month.  Then…. I went for 2 weeks on vacation in Bangkok and Bali with my brother Pierre, followed by another special visitor (also called Pierre), a fabulous week of business in Sydney Australia or shall I call it “temptation island”!   Through out my technical challenge, I lost the entire blog I had just finished writing on being a “Big Tall Girl in a Girly Girly World”.  I got discouraged when I saw everything wiped out and decided to redo it at a later date.  Anyways, what I have figured out through this “chill out” period gave me a new perspective on the girly topic and my opinion evolved during this two month period.  I will put the “girly world” post on the ice for the moment and will resume it with a better analysis later on this year.Meanwhile I am full of fabulous images and memories of my trips to Thailand, Indonesia and Australia. So much has happened in my life in the last 7 weeks that my head still spins.  They are all good things that I am very grateful for, so I decided to call my new post: Terima kasih Bali and matur suksma Ubud. Terima kasih in Indonesian (language very close to bahasa Malaysian) means “thank you”, but in Balinese, the local language of Bali, thank you is: Suksma and Matur Suksma means “thank you very much”.  In Thailand, the same expression is khorb koon ka. Regardless of the country you are in, these grateful words should be accompanied by a gesture of your two hands joined at the chin and a humble salute from the head.  This peaceful custom of many countries of Asia is one of the elements that make the Asian peoples so down to earth and so lovable: they are everything but arrogant! It is also what will get you around and will get you the gratitude of these amazing peoples. What I want to thank Bangkok for is for showing me crudely and without shame some reality of Asia. A cultural chock that I had not yet experienced. The worst and the best all at once.  Also I am thankful for the exchange of an outstanding amount of energy: Every day, Bangkok ruthlessly sucked my energy and generously gave me back as much in return through its beat and kindness. The J.J. market (as the locals call it) is one of the most exciting shopping experience I had the privilege of living: You can buy a decorative basket, a Buddha, furniture pieces, art, the best freshly squeezed orange juice of your life, clothing or the fur skin of an endangered tiger specie, all in one of the many lanes of this huge local market.  It can easily take up to two days to visit all the stalls of this outdoor market and since two days is all you have, you promise yourself to come back again…. and again! The Jatuchak (J.J. or Chatuchak) is a market that is built and teared down every weekend was originally created to encourage local handy craft artists.  Although the market still counts an impressive amount of local craftsmen, it has evolved to become a shopping heaven for designers and people like me.  Thanks a million to my friend Julie for giving us a private tour of this shopping jungle and to have brought us to eat the best Pad Thai I could dream of.(http://www.bangkokpicture.com/pictures/jatuchak05.php)   Spending 3 days in Bangkok was a rich lesson of humility, and a fascinating understanding of the intertwined communication system that was developed through time as a survival tool for its population.  Each person on the street from the tuk tuk driver, the official guard at the King’s palace gate to the rich merchant of emeralds  is interrelated. A splendid supply chain to generate business to one another. Bangkok will gently extract every loose Thai bat a tourist has, but will do it in a kind and informative way, using an intelligent choreography of eye contacts, gestures, pre-negotiated patterns and interconnection based on human solidarity. As my brother Pierre would so rightly say: If you have a problem with this intelligent survival extortion system when you are a wealthy North American, go see “Doctor Get-over-it” and move on. Bangkok is a city of extremes: In one day, my brother and I witnessed the greatest poverty I had seen in my life (I know India is worst but I have not seen it) and finished the day in the most spectacular bar restaurant (Sirocco, also called “the Dome”) located on the roof of the tallest building of Thailand (Estate building).   http://www.thedomebkk.com/web/corp_about.html Kindness, gentle smiles and beautiful people who successfully kept their dignity through the challenges of life is my in-printed image of my recent trips. In Bali, a simple “Thank you”, “Hello” and “Good morning” in their language will bring you the world and as a bonus, if you want to bargain the price of the world… they will love you for it.   My brother (contrary to me) does not like to bargain, particularly when the people he is trying to buy from hardly make a basic living. -How much for this bag?-$200,000 rupiahs ($25) - OK! says my brother - No Sir!, answered the lady who hand makes those beautiful batik bags, I say a price and you say one than I say another price, we go like this until we agree on a price! - I am OK with the price answered my brother, I don’t want to negotiate. - Ya! but Sir it is the game, this is the way we set prices in Indonesia. This is where I barged in and said: - OK, I will give you $30,000 rupiahs for the big bag. - Ah! no Mam, it is too low, they are hand made by me and it takes a long time.   -OK, I will give you $40K, final price. - All right Mam, $50,000, but I will make no profit on it.   My brother looked at me savoring my victory with a smile on my face, I was proud of my bargaining drill, when I heard him say: - $50,000 rupiahs is $5.00 Canadian and I don’t understand that someone can live selling her hard work for so little.  What is $25 (the original price) worth to you Helene? For a moment I felt he was right and I did feel cheap, but the lady was happy to have sold 2 bags (each $5.00) and 2 belts (I negotiated as well).  I could see in her face the satisfaction of having played the game and the legendary Balinese smile made her face glow again.  We then went next door to a good French restaurant where we blew a small fortune on wine and great food. I don’t remember well the taste of the wine, nor the flavour of the Tuareg couscous we ate , yet I love and see the $5.00 bag I gave to Annabelle every day and it is a reminder of how people of Bali know more about kindness and generosity than I will ever do. My next visit in Bali will be in April for my boyfriend’s birthday, and I already know that I will play the game again just to see their beautiful eyes and smiles light up the room, but I will ensure that I stop before I ruthlessly eat the shirt (or the sarong) off a poor woman’s back or get a carved wood piece of art for $7 when the man took almost an hour to carve it before my eyes. Bali brought peace to my hectic life and I could not get enough of its beauty.  My brother Pierre and I hired a private guide called Madé, to visit the entire island from left to right, from North to South. The rice fields surrounding Ubud become pieces of art when mixed with the end of day sunlight and each village has its own specialty of Handy craft: a village for the stone carving, one for the wood carving, one for the bricks in which houses are built and one for the roof tiles.  There are as many different crafts as there are villages and my brother had such a good laugh when we saw the village specialized in fake antics.  They are really good at it! Our private tour guide Madé is the second child of his family. In Bali a first born child is called Wayan, the second: Madé, the third: Nyoman, the fourth: Ketuk and at five, you start over the list adding Balik to the name Wayan.  The fifth one is therefore called Wayan Balik and the list repeats itself.  Women and men are called the same and all you need to add to the name is “i” (or “e” if you pronounce it in English) to the man’s name and “ni” (pronounced knee) for the woman: Ni Madé and i Madé for the man. -So Madé, what do you do with your beautiful family on the weekend?   I always ask because I am curious to find out the resemblance or the difference of life style when visiting other countries.  I want to know everything about cultures and traditional customs. -Do you gather with friends over dinner or you bring the kids to the park, tell me about your free time with your family? I followed to say. Madé looked at me with a puzzled face and answered: - We work every day of our lives and we don’t have weekends or vacations like you do in America.  I am tired and when I come home, the little time we have we use it to take care of the necessary things for our house and family. Madé’s wife takes care of a silk and batik boutique in the centre of Ubud.  I bought a silk sarong from her and did not try to bring the price down this time around. She is a stunning beauty with a smile and a personality bigger than life. My expert brother Pierre kept on telling Madé that he married Miss Bali and that no one comes close to the beauty of his young wife, anywhere on the island of Bali.  Madé was rightfully very proud and we could not resist to capture this beautiful family in photo.   Hopefully, one day, Madé and his gorgeous family of two kids will make their dream of owning a boutique come true, but meanwhile if I can tell enough people to use Madé as a private tour guide when visiting Bali, I will have succeeded to contribute a little bit in shaping their dream. I know what it is to dream and to make it happen.  It only takes a magic wan and I am lucky enough to have found one!    Now Australia! I cannot say enough about the beauty of Sydney.  If the rest of Australia is populated with as many beautiful peoples as Sydney, I can only think they should have called it “temptation island”. From the moment I took the Airbus 380 (yes I did!), I felt like a 4 course gourmet meal to their eyes.  As much as Singapore men are shy and will not directly look at a woman, Australians are the complete opposite. If any single girls feel discouraged with men in their part of the world, spend the money on a plane ticket to Australia, the land of Marlboro man!  The best ego booster a woman can get. Let me clarify something, the adjective “Marlboro man” does not mean that they smoke cigarettes, it means they look like the man in the advertising.   If I wanted to put a ratio figure to the ad, I would say that 25% of Sydney’s population is absolutely gorgeous!!    Women too (especially when they are young).   The minute I would step out of the hotel, the interaction would start: - May I help you with anything? Perhaps you can tell me where you wish to go and I will guide you Miss.  Says the Marlboro man with a look that revealed he was also a surfer when he was off his advertising billboard’s duty.  He looked at me straight in the eyes and I knew he was not kidding, nor working for the city. - I’ll be all right, I am just looking to understand the schedule of the ferries to go to “Manly” beach (real name of this beach and perfect name too).   Now I can hear all my girlfriends wondering why I pushed him away the way I did and perhaps one could think that there are so many gorgeous man in Australia that you can afford to think “I will start flirting tomorrow”. The truth is that I had committed to a serious relationship the month prior to my trip to Australia and this was the ultimate test to see if my decision was the right one. I survived the test of “temptation island” and my boyfriend Pierre was a real man himself to have survived my business trip to Australia, while he was traveling himself to Los Angeles and Denver. There was no doubt that he had a few sweat while hearing me savoring all the details of my multiple Marlboro interactions during the week. But Sydney on its own, is just breath taking. I had a night cruise with customers that I cannot erase from my mind and over a week’s time, I had the opportunity of walking many portions of this fabulous city. I felt as if I was in Canada: very similar in climate (except for our vicious winters), in structure and in mentality.  I felt like home in Australia!  It was a great feeling.  I could live there tomorrow.    I was also pleasantly surprised to see that my work was well known in Australia and that they where waiting for me to help them implement my strategies.  I also was the MC of the worldwide Premier Partners Convention and a speaker at the event.  During this conference I heard one of the most inspiring speech from Li Cunxin (his book is called “Mao’s last dancer”), the most fabulous story of how determination, work and focus can break the greatest barriers of life.  After his speech, you could have heard the tears dropping from the 300 peoples in the room. I had the pleasant job of going back on stage to break the ice and continue the conference. This was a small barrier compare to his.  Overall it was a fantastic trip and at a certain moment, I felt a bit euphoric: I was in Australia, for myself and not for anyone else, at the other end of the planet, living my international dream and being recognized for my work, all at once…with Sydney as a background.   Laying on the beach of Bondi with my ipod in my ears and surfers running around me, I thought to myself: Terima kasih life, matur suksma la vie! …..then, I text messaged Pierre because happiness reaches its peak when it is shared! Here is Madé’s phone number in Bali if you decide to go live your own trip.  Madé: 08123910231 Once you are in Bali, you dial it the way it is written above.  P.S: Some of the pictures are mine, some are from my brother Pierre as I lost many of mine in the wipe out of my computer.  He is a much better photographer than me anyways.  Some photos of me are from Pierre Rouleau.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvoqgSG9eWI  (opening of Bangkok’s locks with boats coming out.  Really cool!), (this is a tuk tuk ride in the streets of Bangkok)

Won Ton, Sushi, BBQ, Earl Grey and Maple Syrup… OK Lah!

 

 

Integrating into a new culture is one thing, but integrating into many at the same time demands a high capacity of adaptation.  I can all hear you saying: Ya Ya Helene, but you are so flexible and adaptable that it is easy for you!  You are right and wrong or shall I say wlight and wlong!!Although Singapore is mainly composed of 80% Chinese and Malay, the 15% of expatriates makes it an interesting soup of British, Australians, Americans, Japanese, Indonesians, Indians and of course, the French Canadian that I am.  -Why are you calling yourself French Canadian?

Is the first question my Australian co-worker asked me!  Aren’t you all Canadians?   (expressed with his lovely accent that emphasises and stretches the second “a” of Canadians).

-But of course! I answered; we are just not from the same background; the English originate from British and the Irish descendants while the French Canadians originate from France. We say French Canadian because our mother tong is French.    

He looked at me a bit puzzled and then turned around to look at the office and said: Welcome to the Fuji Xerox United Nations, we are all from a different background here so you may stick to Canadian only and no worries!  

“No worries” is a British expression for “no problem”, the words “Hi! Hi!” may mean “Hello” to English people, but it is yes! yes! in Japanese.  “How How” means “Good! Good” in Chinese, while “shay” is the Chinese “thank you”, yet  for a French Canadian it is pronounced the same as “chez” that means “at”.  Are you confused? So was I the first few days!  

So the melting pot of conversations we witness in the open concept of my office is quite colourful.  I have three Japanese, two Australians, my immediate neighbour is a Singaporean Chinese and we complete everything with two British gentlemen, my great American colleague Jennie, Honey who is Korean and then Terry, a Chinese Australian. 

-Why do you say Chinese Australian?  Aren’t you all Australians? 

-Yes, but as you see Helene, I am Chinese! By the way Helene, what is this bottle you offered me, is it wine?

-No, it is maple syrup and this is what I am made of! I am a maple syrup Canadian; sweet at first but I can be processed in different things… if you make my blood boil! J

In a typical day at the office, you hear my Japanese friends say “Hi!”Hi!” every two seconds over the phone.  The first day, I thought they were saying “Hello” every two seconds and had communication problems, but I quickly discovered that it means; Yes!  

-Why do you always say yes to everything the other person says? You agree with everything they say and just take orders over the phone or what?

-No!  She answered.

-Aaaah!  I got a “no” from you!  

-Yes you did!

-No, please don’t say “yes” again!!!! 

In Japanese, saying yes does not mean that they agree, it means: I hear what you are saying. 

-So, will you do what they have asked? 

-No, not necessarily! (pronounced necessalely, in Japanese “R” and “L” are the same sound and have no differences in pronunciation)

-What do you mean no? You told them yes!  How do you Japanese get clear messages? How do you say no? How do you read each other?

-We use a long detour and a chain of people to finally let the person know that we don’t agree with what they said. Saying no is not part of our culture.

-Wow! This must be complicated, I replied. 

-Hi!  why do you think I am here Helene?  I want to work in a more straight forward way like you guys! 

-What “us” are you talking about?  “Us” is a broad statement in a United Nations’ environment, but I understand clearly: “hi!”.   

Minutes after  I hear my Chinese colleague switching from English to Chinese depending on the person he is speaking with and he kept on repeating: How, how… Howww, howww! 

-So Philip, did you find out how?

- What do you mean Helene?

-Well you kept on asking how, so did he tell you? 

-No, I meant in Chinese:  Good, Good!  In Chinese we repeat words twice, it is simple no?!!! 

-Yes, very simple and “Shay Shay” Philip, “Shay Shay”!    Actually I understand, OK lah?  OK lah! (pronounced “law”).

The most colourful part of Singapore is its “Singlish” language, a simple cross between Chinese and English.  It is English in a very simplified Chinese grammar structure.  In Singapore the official business language is English and if we say “official” it means “government law” and we all know that the government of Singapore means business.  Everyone who has a job must speak English and unemployment rate is very low, at about 3%.  So just about every person in Singapore speaks English or shall I say: Singlish! My thrill of the day is always the conversation I will engage with the local cab drivers on my way to work or on my way back home. 

Taxi drivers have a mind of their own and they are to Singapore what the yellow cabs are to New-York.  You cannot live without them because a car here is the most expensive toy a man can buy.  A mini cooper is close to $100,000 (Sing dollars or $70,000 cdn) and to get the right to drive your toy, for a maximum of 10 years, you must apply “on-line” and bid for a permit.  Although you have all the chances on your side to win the bid, this “right to drive” can cost between $15,000 and $50,000 depending on the demand. Then come the road taxes that are calculated on your engine power (between $2500 and $6000 a year) so guys beware that bigger is not better here unless you are rich and did I mention the pay toll for using the highways?  A Porsche is $500,000 and a Ferrari around $1.4 million.  Most cars on the roads are BMW, Mercedes and all the other luxurious cars you can think of.  I have seen more Bentleys in the last week than in my entire life before.  I must tell my friend Joel who owns Decarie Motors (Bentley dealership) in Montreal that here is where he should be.  I know I am selfish because it also means he would come with his wife Suzan, my friend of over 25 years.   When someone says here that she owns a Toyota Camry, I almost bowel I know she is rich or in debt! Yes you can buy a second hand car, but the right to drive is linked to this particular car, so since a permit last 10 years, your 5 year old car has 5 years left on the “right to drive”.  This means that after 5 years you will scrap the car and reapply for another permit.  

All this to say how powerful cabs are in a situation like this. They rule Singapore! They can and will ignore you completely on the street, rudely refuse to take you by waving aggressively their hand when they pass by you, even if you look desperate to get to destination. If they stop and ask you where you are going and leave in a flash when it is not where they had planned to go (leaving your skin on the door handle of the cab), don’t feel it has something to do with the colour of your skin and don’t take it personal. Cabs also have a tendancy to wait to get a call because there is a $2.00 to $4.00 charge if you pre-book a taxi.  If it is a Mercedes, it will be a booking fee of $8.00! Sometimes you stand on the street or in a taxi queue for 20-30 minutes to wait for a taxi and you simply give up. You call the company and book a cab!  Within 30 seconds to a minute, a cab arrives from the corner street (the same one who refused you before) and the meter is ready to go with a pre-charge of $4.00.   When they stop and let you in, rude man becomes a charming service provider with a great sense of humour who will let you into his too cold taxi only to project his warmest smile while saying:

-Yes mam, “nee how” (how are you?)  Siglap load hein? Siglap road Hein! OK lah!  Can! Can! Because you go to Siglap Hein! We take ECP* Ok lah?  (*ECP is the highway with automated pay toll)

During the cab ride, a moment in time gets captured; the cab drivers and I have the most interesting conversations in “Singlish”.  I listen carefully because I love to imitate languages and it is a real treat for me to hear this simple colourful language that British people seem to find ugly, except for my colleague Steve who enjoys and embraces it as much as I do!  Most of the sentences in Singlish will start with “Because” or “Actually” and you will always have Hein! And OK lah in it.  “Lah” in Chinese has the signification of finality so it makes sense that it ends sentences.  Over time it became a language crutch like the “Ay” in Canada and the “Euh” in French. They say “can” instead of “yes” and “cannot” instead of “no”, even if it does not make sense to “us”.  You call a restaurant and ask: Do you have a table for four at 7:30 pm?  The person will answer “Can” or “cannot”. 

Now let me relate to you a snap shot of one of those cab conversations:

-You going to Anson Road Fuji Xerox Hein?  -Yes!  -Ok Lah, can! can! Fuji Xerox Anson road Hein? Can! Take ECP Hein?  Fuji Xerox Hein? Use to be IBM building hein? OK lah?

-Yes Sir!  I know it use to be IBM, but the sign has been changed to Fuji Xerox 6 years ago, we pushed over the big blue and it is our sign now OK lah? Hein!

-You flom where?

-Canada

-Ohhhh! Hot here in Singapore! 

-Yes but I like it very much. Singapore is a fabulous city, clean safe and beautiful. No billboards, no electrical wires, no pollution and always hot. Each night is a perfect night with no wind and no rain, just a perfect night every night!

-Actually because you say come flom Canada, I say cold Hein?  I think cold OK Lah?

-I know you think that but we have four seasons and summer can be hot there too. Did you work all night and morning Sir?

- Actually because I work hard, because I have daughter.  She say she go to “U” so need to work all the time for next 2 to thlee years actually, OK lah? (“U” means university)

-OK lah SIr! Ooups! you need to turn left here Sir!  Sir, Sir, left Sir, left I said, left OK lah Hein?  Then the car steers on the left. 

-Left here Hein? Can!

-Yes Sir, Ooouf!  OK lah! Here is Fuji Xerox Sir, Fuji Xerox here Sir! Here OK laaaaah!  

For some strange reasons, everything must be repeated a number of times before they are understood.  I know and he knows that we both understood the first time around, but the game is played every time with different drivers.  That is the colour of Singapore!Cab drivers are usually pretty knowledgeable on what is going on in the world.  Many will mention Calgary, the petroleum extraction from sand in Edmonton; they understand the economics of our timing in the fight for natural resource and globalization.  They all have a cousin or a relative living in Canada somewhere, mainly in Hongcouver and Edmonton. 

-Beautiful countly Canada, like you Miss!  (the only men in Singapore who dare flirting with me are the cab drivers. )

-You have been there Sir?

-No! But my cousin …………

-Ok lah! I know!  “Shay Shay”, how much do I owe you? $ eight dollars and folty Mam! Can.

-Mam!, last week I was a Mom!  Is this an upgrade? Anyways, thank you Uncle.  

P.S: I dedicate this article to Claude Thibault who has trained me on Asian culture before I left.  She was 100% right on her interpretation of the culture and the challenges of integration.  If ever you move to Asia, call her (I think she is working for Transcontinental Direct in Montreal now).  It is worth it and it helps set your mind to identify where you will be different and challenged. Thank you Claude, I often smile when I think of you.  I love every second of the learning and have a great time with my multicultural friends when we have a beer in an Irish Pub or a New Zealand club!  I know you will think that you all have multiracial friends in Canada and that it is the same as here, but no!!   Cannot!  In Canada, they all come from different countries to start a long integration in our cultural environment and values.  Here, the foundation of the culture is Chinese and Malay (60% Chinese and 25% Malay 15% mixed expats) and I am the one living in their environment.  The expatriates, in most situations, are here for two years and don’t really need to adapt to their new country, they are in transit!  I chose to dive into their culture, watch and learn!  It is quite an enjoyable ride, OK lah!

Now, many of you have asked to have news about my health and I am touched by how many people care about me, so here is a public statement! 

I am doing great, my health is really good and I sleep so well since I am in Singapore.  I completely recovered my voice after 6 weeks even though the verdict called for permanent damage and partial recovery with a one year therapy.  I did my therapy religiously twice a day and forced myself in delivering conferences even if it sounded like I had laryngitis. Now I am alive, loud and kicking.  I have a nice scar as a trophy and rub it with vitamin E every day (Thank you Sharon).  I did not gain an ounce or a gram even if the cuisine is simply exquisite everywhere, even at home (thanks to Annabelle).  I am a bit out of shape “because cannot find good exercise routine here yet” but this is my next focus.   My brother Pierre will arrive in two weeks and we are planning to celebrate our birthdays (October 14 and 16) in Bangkok, followed by one week in Bali.  In November I have a business trip to Australia and will try to plan a weekend in the wilderness of Borneo with friends for December.  End of December, my great friend Nicole and her husband Dan will come to celebrate New Year with me and will stay two months PLUS, on and off.  I will certainly meet them here and there in their travelling. Meanwhile, I am busy at the office and will travel to Kuala Lumpur next week. 

I say two months PLUS because it is another colourful expression of Singapore.  When they want to say “more than” or “over”, they will say “plus” instead.  Lost in translation, it means that I will be 40 plus in two weeks plus and that too is a 10 year permit!

Fun blog stats to share:  I had 1,035 peoples who visited my blog last week and a peak day of 300 last Saturday.  Thanks for all the kind words and the encouragement.  I am doing OK lah!

Next week’s topic:  I am a big tall girl in a girly – girly world!

Take care!Helene (or as they write here: LN)  

References: Photos of the cactus graffiti, botanical garden, orchyds, Dempsey road store, Sharon and I are all from my friend Jacques Giraud (husband of Sharon), a great photographer who kindly took pictures when I asked, because I had forgotten my camera that day!      

I do marketing in the afternoon Mam!

c

You may also see other photos by clicking on these links!

Me in the bird parkBird, Park visit Blue Bird, living room, DInning room area, Second half of Patio, First half of my Patio, Chambre1.jpg, Dragon iguana, Sentosa beach Singapore, Birds parrots in the park, Port of Singapore

 For those of you who know me well, you will be surprised to hear that I am now a Mom!! I still have no kids and I did not adopt one either, but I must admit that I have adopted the Asian life style: I now have a full time domestic! Call it “Home Maid”, “Maid in China” or female buttler, she is a fabulous domestic helper living full time with me, and she calls me Mom or Mam with a British accent! All domestic workers call their employer Mam or Sir, they called the cab drivers “Uncles” and a lady over forty-five working in a store or anywhere else: Aunty! Yes in Singapore we seem to be all a happy family and probably all related to Buddha.

As I mentioned before, living in Asia is living with different standards and domestics are part of life here. I knew I was a full time job for myself, but I never imagined I could become a full time job for someone else! But I guess I am, because Annabelle (that’s her name) never stops a moment to take care of me, day or night. If you are already in chock, sit down; take a deep breath because you are in for a ride.

 

When I visited the 17 or 18 apartments with my real-estate agent before selecting this one, I kept on asking him if there were smaller apartments available. I thought they were all too big for me: 1400 to 3500 sq. feet with 3 bedrooms are the standards in Singapore (opposite of Hong Kong and Tokyo). I said to him: These are for big families and I am alone and by the way, why do they have these ugly laundry rooms with lockers? He replied: These are the maids’ quarters and all apartments (90% of them) are equipped with maids’ quarters! I know that for you North Americans it sounds like slavery, but here Madame it is a standard!

 

These tiny maids’ apartments are usually attached to the kitchen, no air conditioning (it is very, very hot here), no windows, and when there is one (mine is equipped with one) there is no glass in the whole of the window. It is usually located next to the washer and dryer… with the garbage trap as a bed head. What should play the role of the bedroom is smaller than any of the closets you have: 4’ X 5’ room closed by an accordion plastic door (worst than a prison cell). It looks very much like lockers you would find in condominiums, except that here, it is 90% humidity and 32 degrees at night. Did I mention that the “no glass window” is overlooking the garbage main trap of the entire building? A heaven for cockroaches and other tropical pests that you don’t want to hear about. Most people put a crib mattress on the floor or a small bed in the room. Yes, 99% of the domestics sleep there.

 

Many of my colleagues at work (Except Jennie, an American with the same standard as me) told me that they don’t feel bad about this situation because in maids’ country (mainly Philippines and Indonesia), they sleep on the floor without a mattress. This is an upgrade apparently! Agencies through whom you hire Foreign Domestic Workers tell you the same thing and I guess most people tend to feel better about it, knowing it is the norm. I say most people, not everyone and you have guessed right, not me!

 

At work, and in my social life, everyone I know have a maid. I must admit that it is amazing to have someone doing all the work for you and she even irons my smallest clothing articles, my bed sheets, etc. Life in Singapore means long hours and when you come home at 7:30 or 8:00 pm and you have not done the grocery, nor did the laundry and still need to cook dinner, you feel that your life is all about work and chores.

 

Of course I want to live a little this amazing life here and since I can afford more because (sorry to say) income taxes are very very low in Singapore; why not adopting the life style. So I joined the club and adapted well to Asia.

 

Annabelle is amazing and a fabulous cook who cuts exotic fruits for my breakfast and times the perfect moment to bring me my coffee. While I eat, she makes my bed so I come back to a clean neat bedroom to get dressed for work, she makes me choose the recipe she will follow for the dinner meal and I only have to say that I will have few people over for dinner for her to run to the market. This leads me to explain to you the title of my blog!!

 

When I interviewed Annabelle, she got me at Hello, but I pretended to conduct a full interview anyways. When I asked her to describe a typical day in her current position, she proceeded with enthusiasm to say that she prepares breakfast in the morning and cleans for few hours and then said: I do marketing in the afternoon Mam! I looked at her stunned! Here I had worked all these years to build my expertise, studied at night and weekends to do my MBA and earned every piece of my life, built a career and yet, my house keeper does the same thing as me! Was this a match made in heaven? Could I also use her for doing some of my work and reduce the long working hours of Singapore (8h45am to 7:00-7:30pm with a lot of non productive time, but this is another topic). I rapidly asked Annabelle to explain to me what she does for her current Mam in the marketing department? I go to the market Mam, I do marketing of fruits, meat and all the things you need to eat! I nicely smiled and said: This is really good Annabelle and since I am a marketing specialist, you and me will get along just great! Can you start tomorrow?

 

Annabelle moved in the day after. We use the maid’s quarter as a storage room for the ugly furniture that was supplied with the apartment, we put a screen in the large “No glass window” to prevent any pest intrusion (she knows how crazy I am about anything that crawls) and we use the maid’s quarter as the laundry room. We laugh every time we open that door and think it should be her apartment. You must know that Annabelle is in Singapore working for Expatriates since 14 years and she usually had to live in the maid’s quarter (except for one British couple who moved to Barcelona and treated her well too for a couple of years). I gave her the third room of my apartment (should be an office) where there was a built-in bunk bed. I bought her a TV and gave her a large closet. The room is large and air conditioned, pretty and comfortable. We went shopping together for her to select her bedspread; she picked a bright yellow comforter with large flowers on it. She placed her stuffed animals in all the little squares of the bunk bed walls and the first night I gave her a copy of the “Little Prince” that she read in two days. A large window with a view on the garden is taking most of the outside wall of the bedroom. When she first saw her room, Annabelle started to cry and hugged me. She kept on thanking me for treating her like this: I prayed God every day for a Mam like you!

 

Annabelle is a 42 year old mother of an 18 year old girl. She had to leave her baby behind in Philippines when she was 2 months old!

Annabelle goes to church every Sunday and does volunteer church work in the afternoon. I give her every Sunday off and the agency told me that I am spoiling it for all the other Mams she will have in the future. What you are doing is bad Madame Blanchette, the government only requires for you to give her one day a month and you could demand to never let her out!! You just have to pay the day off she would have taken and demand that she stays in. Like this she will have no time to do bad things.

 

When you hire a maid in Singapore, you have a responsibility: you must have an orientation class that you do on-line. The government explains their rights and your duty as a Mom. Their rights are the basic things of life and you are stunned that they have to explain to people that they must provide proper meals and a minimum 4 inch thick mattress to sleep. They try to protect the workers by teaching the employers not to demand for her to hang from the 22nd floor of a building to clean your window (a maid died doing that last month and the mom went to jail for 6 months with a fine of $15 000). They give you serious warning on what is acceptable and what is not. Yet some people abuse the workers. The government also requires a $5000 bond that you lose if the worker leaves the country, gets into trouble or gets pregnant. You must go through a certified recruitment agency to do all the paperwork.

Annabelle sends most of her salary to pay for her daughter’s schooling and to help her family of 9 children. She looks like she is 20 years old and is such a great woman. She is now with me for a little over one month and we get along well. She does not try to play the role of a roommate; she is very discreet and disappears after diner in her new quarters to read the newspaper and watch her favourite TV shows. She has gained so much confidence in a month that it is fascinating to see her evolve: she now takes initiatives, she goes shopping for me and negotiates well (you get charged way more when you are a white caucasian woman). She is excited at night when I arrive because she can show me all the initiatives she has taken to fix this or that, to improve the way the garden is or to have made the landlord replace my shower. Annabelle has transformed into an adult in a month, discusses at diner about the economy of Singapore and tells me the last horror story on maids who died from bad treatments or killed their Mom (I think she is trying to keep me on my toesJ).

 

My friend Sharon and her husband Jacques spent 10 great days with me in Singapore and she catered to them so well that there was a big hugging session when they left for Dubai. The day after Annabelle made it clear that she misses Mam Sharon and Sir Jacques. I hope they will find a job in Singapore she added. I laughed and reminded her that we have a contract and that she is stocked with me for 2 years. She smiled and insisted on how much God was good to her. When she laughs at me for wanting a pest free environment (a challenge in tropical countries), she tells me her story of the 22 feet python that was curled up under the dining room table of her last Mom’s apartment (a year ago). He had just eaten a big animal (she says a pig but I suspect a dog) and had crawled from the patio opening to the dining room table to try to digest his meal. The body of the snake was about 8-10 inches in diameter. Although more frequent when you live next to the reservoir, the bird park (a must see) or the zoo (with its fantastic night safari), I will not take a chance and leave the doors closed! She then completes her story by asking me: Did I tell you about the snake tail that was sticking out of the air conditioning unit and that my master has pulled suddenly? No Annabelle I don’t want to hear the story from you, but if your old master is still in Singapore and free tonight, he could tell me himself!! J

 

The mysterious garbage island!

Living in Asia means different standards.  Singapore is definitely the easiest city you can find in the Asian land to arrive and discover this part of the world.  Yes Singapore is as clean as the legend says and yes it is true that you cannot buy chewing gum,  but no one will bother you if you do chew it, as long as you don’t throw it on the ground!!  So please when you come and visit me, bring me a stock of chewing gum.

Anyway! The city is so clean that you instinctively want to participate in keeping it this way.  The first few weeks I was trying to figure out what they do with garbage.  After three weeks, I had not yet seen a garbage truck or a garbage bag.  It became something I needed to uncover, WHERE DO THEY PUT THE GARBAGE?  How could I be in a city of 4.8 million peoples and never see a green bag in a back alley, even in the middle of the night?  I imagined a major underground system that everyone is connected to, even restaurants.  I thought of a sophisticated belt carrier system that brings garbage out of the city without human intervention.  It would have not been a surprise since everything in Singapore is the latest high-tech system, that allows the government to give you tickets and to control speed, trouble in the city and any other daily activities that is going on.  you give your passport number and your visa number for absolutly everything you hire or purchase. It is a fascinating high-tech city.  No need to open doors in most places, the water faucet or the toilet will also run and flush on their own almost everywhere and rarely will you need to physically touch something.  This amazing modern city has embraced technology at warp speed when SARS happened and people became freaked about germs.  You never see a police car on the streets or highways (I saw one in two months), no need because cameras and scanners monitor absolutely everything.  When a cab driver speeds up, he gets a call to be told it is not acceptable!!!  

But really, what do they do with those ugly garbage bags that are placed on the streets, in piles, everywhere else on the planet? After all, the city is so clean that they must have a garbage bin somewhere?  After 2 months, I saw twice a garbage truck at my condominium complex (which is so clean that I think they repaint it every day).  They come early in the morning before most humans get up (they all get up at 7:00am with the sun).  Garbage bags are hidden in the basements in containers (everywhere in the city) and they only come out for few minutes to get into the truck (helped by the flashy lime green little workers, usually imported from Malaysia and India). This is the moment where the garbage bags start their journey to a remote mysterious island between Indonesia and Singapore.  Their second life will be to serve as ground for the reclaimed land that Singapore keeps on needing to expand.  Indonesians and Malaysians feel that Singapore is getting closer and closer to them and they do not really appreciate it.  So, no matter where you are in the world, someone loves to hate their neighbours, particularly when they are successful and clean to a point where they manage their garbage to be your backyard! 

From my office, on the 36th floor of the Fuji Xerox towers, I see Indonesia like you can see the south shore from the island of Montreal.  I see tons of islands and at least 1000 ships a day parked in sea waiting to unload or pick-up their container cargos.  I know that one of those islands is a garbage paradise island, where bags tan under the hot sun.   Which island serves the purpose is still a mystery to me, but I know for sure that within the next 5 years, Singapore will have grown to reach this island and a beautiful human paradise island will immerge from it! This is the only recycling being done here.  The government teaches you how to recycle, but have no programs in place to do it.  Probably because people would not support the scenery of the blue bins, full of garbage, on the beautiful streets of Singapore.

As last garbage thought to leave you with, now think for a moment of what ships do when they are parked for a while in the bay! Then ask me if I would swim in the water!

Getting started in Asia land

Hello my friends.  Again, for those who have not received a note from me, I will start by stating that I will write my blog in English.  If I have to write in French and in English, I will not be able to keep the blog going.  Since 99% of my French friends and family are bilingual, the chosen language will be English.  Stay tune for a real update on my adventures in Asian Land!!

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